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Return of Monkey

Previous Thread: >>68247
Archive: https://archive.ph/O2VOn

Mangadex page: https://mangadex.org/title/4af2a8ae-6d71-44b1-95d7-9fb30a436e7b
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>>104588 (OP) 
Roughs for Chapter 15:

>p_065
Dropped “Determination” down to another “line”.

>p_066
Revised the bottom panel to Majira’s breathing from “Kuh…” Raw text was “フーッ”. Might be just me, but the style of the raw text for it makes it seem like this is just a brisk jog for him than anything, whether it’s him being in much better shape, or the scientists having been running for longer already. If you’d rather it look harsher, I’ll adjust it.

>_067
Having some real trouble finding the right word to describe the first two motions in panel 1, of his crawling along the wall and ceiling. Planning on “pouncing” for the final motion.

>p_069
Debated some about the best sound for Majira’s victim hitting the floor. The raw came out to “Splash”, but that didn’t quite feel right, compared to something like “Slish” (wet, but sliding) or “Slosh” (really wet, heavy). Went with the former since it fit better. Tried to get the panicked scream of the other guy there to have the same chaotic feel to it as the raw had.
Replies: >>104590 >>104834
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>>104589
>p_070
Revised the first panel’s text a bit to have the same fatigued vibe to it as the raw. Figured I’d take another look at the sound effects compared to the raw; let me know what you think here. I do want to confirm though that panel 2 comes off more as Majira stomping the guy’s torso, and not just stabbing into it (like the raptor in Jurassic Park 3 does to, I think his name was Udeski?), and that the bubble closest to the mouth is indeed just a wet spurting sound and not some sort of vocalization.

>p_071
Noticed the door has a different mechanical hiss between opening and closing, so I tried to approximate the feeling in English. Let me know if you can think of a better way to write it out.

>p_072
Rephrased the first panel a bit to render better. “Ara ara” in panel 3 to “My, my…” Rephrased the second bubble slightly.

>p_073
Fixed “Mekhila” to “Mihira”. “…Ok!” in panel 4 to “…Alright!” To double check, is “we’re” the appropriate phrasing for the third bubble? I mean, yeah, she’s talking to herself, but is it implied she’s talking about the group as a whole reeking havoc as “while we’re at it”? Rephrased the bubble a little to render better; retained the “~” from the raw. “Deluxe” feels like a bit of a weird word there (it’s from the previous English script, but I’ll leave it up to you if it feels like it should be revised.

>p_074
Rephrased the second bubble a little. “on the surface” in panel 2, bubble 1 to “up top”. “top side” could also work if you ask me. Added a “much” to the second bubble. “Ara” in the third bubble to “Oh my”; earlier” to “quicker”. Rephrased the first bubble in panel 3 to better fit the raw; is Mihira implying it was her anticipation, or might it be more what was anticipated for the group as a whole going in as to how long it would take. The second one, I’ll admit I’m a bit confused by the intent of. I mean, clearly they’re not working for them anymore, but is he just asking who’s paying them, or implying that they’ve been quietly bought off or out? I sort of feel like there’s more of the latter intended, by the flow of the conversation, but that’s just me. Previous line was “Who is paying you bastards!!?”
Replies: >>104591
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>>104590
>p_075
Looking at the raw, I feel like Mihira’s use of 消去 is likely intentional with her messing with the institute’s computer network here. I’d opt for “deleting” or “erasing” as the term for killing the employee to fit that idea, like he’s just incriminating data. Also, while the previous English version of the page just calls the scientist “Staff-san”, the raw seems to imply him to be someone in charge, so I’ve shifted it over to “Chief-san”. I feel like “My mission” would be better as “This mission”, as it sounds like everyone else has accomplished what they need to, so it’s not only her mission, but the group’s as well.

>p_076
The pyramid shaped structure in the second panel is the decoration atop the old JR (Japan Railway) Hokkaido Asahikawa Train Station building. Originally, I was just going to put the location name here, along with that of the bridge later, and if readers wanted to dig deeper, they could, but I found something really interesting regarding something Baku says, that warranted about half a notes page on its own, so “Asahikawa Sightseeing” made for good filler. Jingisukan, and Matsuo Jingisukan in particular, are also going to be talked about in detail within the notes section, considering how much Mikado and Baku go on about in here the next few pages.

>p_077
While working on the notes, I figured I’d double check the name of the jingisukan (or rather, the restaurant chain they’re at). Not only, is there no “”, and the English version of their website uses “Matsuo” rather than “Matsuo’s” (sort of odd to me, as it is named after a person, Matsuo Masaru, who devised their style of cooking jingisukan), but the message of the second bubble was entirely wrong. From what I can tell, it’s meant to be more like “when you speak/think of Hokkaido, you speak/think of jingisukan”. That it’s so associated with the image people have, not that going to try some is a given if you go there. Like how McDonalds is correlated with America, but one doesn’t have to (and shouldn’t) go there if they visit. Anyhow, revised the text for the first panel, aside from the last aside about mutton. Added a “that” to the end of “You’re asking me!?” in panel 2. Added an “even” to the second bubble to help emphasize his lack of memories. Added a “here” to the third bubble. “Oh really!?” to “Oh, is that so!? To better work with Mikado’s annoyance. Noted the signage in panel 3. I’d like to double check the text in both of those bubbles, since it looks like the まいう~ is slangy (so I’d think “Yum” or “Delic’!” more than “Delicious!”), while the second bubble seems like it could also be translated as a noise complaint, which I have seen people bring up regarding the Matsuo Jingisukan location at Sapporo Eki-mae in review, so I figured I’d ask. Given the difference in text style for the first bubble, I’d wonder if it’s even Baku saying that. Rephrased Mikado’s exclamation in the fourth bubble. Is there an implication that Charlie Chaplin had a habit of saying that, or was it just a quote he said once and got known for?

[Post text too long, continued in next.]
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>>104591
>Not only, is there no “”
Meant no "の".

>p_078
Rephrased the second bubble in the first panel. I’m not sure we need both “so” and “then” in the third panel’s first bubble. Not sure what Itoh was thinking censoring 松尾 and 松〇尾; is just dropping a circle in the middle of a word indeed another way to do that, or is it a typo? Doesn’t really matter to the English script, but I’m curious. Is the “うん” in Baku’s response meant to be it’s own standalone “Hmm?” Or is it meant to connect more with the first bubble in the next panel? “Ah, sure…” to “Uhh, sure…” since it looks like Mikado’s not quite buying it. I don’t think the text in the second bubble in panel 5 need a comma in it.

>p_079
The first panel is worded rather weirdly. Is it Baku still speaking in the first bubble, and then Mikado agreeing, or Mikado agreeing with himself? I might suggest “Right…” in the second if the latter. The line “朝のこない夜はない” in panel 2 is apparently a well known quote from Yoshikawa Eiji (https://archive.ph/J6Uac). Incidentally, this is also the author of one of the book covers shown in the prior English omake about Houzan being inspired by Miyamoto Musashi. I’d like our proofreader to double check whether or not there’s an established English version of this quote we might want to use for familiarity, assuming it doesn’t interfere with Baku’s follow-up in the fourth panel. Rephrased the bubbles in the fourth panel a little; wondering if “that night” or “a night” would work better with the analogy, that day never breaks for them.
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>>104592
>p_080-081
Rephrased the second bubble as “so hopeless and dreamless” read pretty awkwardly. Debating if “but a wasteland lies” might be better than “but wastelands lie”; if a wasteland doesn’t end, should it be treated as multiple? Just something I’ve been pondering. The fact that Baku is dropping the “kouya” from the series title in the raw here felt worth noting, the way chapter 92’s title of “Lamentation” obviously is to readers, so I figured it was worth English readers being able to pick up on even if the translation is a bit different (I don’t think changing the term from “wasteland/s” to “wilderness” is the best move, between the imagery here and the imagery of the end of the series). Rephrased the second and third bubbles of panel 4 a bit, as Baku is speaking generally on the nature of people, not select persons. Added a “we” to the last bubble, as it’s not like Baku’s not part of humanity himself.

>p_082
“Yes...” in the first bubble to “Right…” To double check, is the text on the bowl really just supposed to feel like an author/artist-aside, or is there perhaps a general slogan like “You’ll eat it after all?” I forget if this is done much in later chapters, as in right on an object” Added a “both” to the first bubble in panel 2; “I can’t waste my time despairing!” to “I can’t waste my time in despair!” In panel 3, “but it wouldn’t connect.” to “but it failed to go through.”

>p_083
“That’s strange” to “That’s weird”. The bridge here is the Asahibashi, built over the Ishikari River. Not sure why Itoh used a posterized photo for it, but it certainly stands out more. Rephrased the bubble about having to go there in person to read more naturally. “Let’s park over here” to “Let’s park over there”; here would imply parking where they already are, when I assume he’s referring to a lot of some sort (entrance to the national park, maybe? I could see them having an information station at the base). “Head through the mountain” comes off more like tunneling through it compared to “mountains” in plural. Made some notes about the flavor text of the signs for those who are curious as to what they say. Looking up the “four seasons” “ropeway” thing and seeing what comes up, I would guess it’s implying something like enjoying or experiencing them as the vehicle heads up the mountain, hence the brackets on the assumed parts. On that note, is “ropeway” even a common term in English for one of those vehicles? I’m sure I’ve heard them more often as cable cars, and a friend suggested gondolas, but I’m not sure if the former would be confused with a cable-in-the-ground trolley and the latter could be confused for the boat. “Aerial Tram” does get the imagery, but I haven’t seen it used much in English myself (but then again, I’m not an outdoors type; way too hot here).

>p_084
I figured it’s best to retain the “please” from the raw in panel 4, as while I don’t think Mikado would take no for an answer, he at least respects Baku enough to request it. “on my own” to “alone”. “Take this.” in panel 7 to “Wait. Take this with you.” Rephrased the last bubble to start with “I figure” than end on “I guess”.
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>>104593
>p_085
“I expect you’ll pay me back.” to “I expect you to repay me.” “The three of us” to “All three of us.” corrected “fish salmon” to “catch ayu”.

>p_086
Added a “we’re” to the second bubble in panel 2, and added a “so” to the first bubble in panel 3. “fish sillago” to “catch sillago”.

>p_087
Rephrased the first bubble to render better; “non-thalamus” to “anti-thalamus” for consistency. “how many Zombist people” in the second feels like “saiya people” Engrish; reworded to “how many of Zombist’s people”; “in there” to “are in there”. The sound of Mikado slowing down in panel 2 didn’t fit within the same space there; moved to the right some in the panel instead. Rephrased the two bubbles in panel 4 to better mesh as a full thought with the “That’s right…” in panel 3. Correct the memory of what Andira said about the fever to match with Chapter 12, as the raw line is the same.

>p_088
Bubbles 1 and 3 in panel 1 are the same as in chapter 12. Bubble 2 isn’t (“Dウイルスが宿主DNAに組み込まれプロウイルス化する時” in chapter 12, vs “Dウイルスが脳内でプロウイルス化する時” here). Given the misremembering, “is when the D-Virus binds itself to the host’s DNA.” to “is when the D-Virus becomes a provirus in the brain.” Bubble 1 in panle 2 is also misrembered, losing the subject of the DV-1 causing it. Mostly worded the line here the same as in chapter 12, but started in a way where it feels like a continuation/definition of the fever in the last bubble of the previous panel. “No…” to “No way…” in the second bubble there. Added a “both” to the start of the first bubble in panel 3, “going through” to “running through” in bubble 2 to better work with “tunnel”; “wearing me out” to “wearing me down” in bubble 3. Rephrased the bubble in panel 4. Panel 5’s raw text is barely different from chapter 11, missing the quotation brackets and using 何とかなる instead of なんとかなる. I’m inclined to just leave it the same wording the same as chapter 11 but leave out the English quotation marks, but let me know if it should be adjusted further.

>p_089
Rephrased the first bubble the render a bit better. “over everything else” in the second bubble to “above all else”. “considering the fact” in bubble 4 to “when you consider the fact”. “that must mean” in panel 2 to “that has to mean”.
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>>104594
>p_090
Rephrased panel 1 to flow more naturally. “a place that large” to “a place that big” in panel 2. “It might” to “That might”.  Rephrased the first bubble in panel 3. 

>p_091
“lab” to “institute”. It’s a bit hard to tell from the art, but I’m guessing Mikado’s jumping through the snow there? Tried to come up with a fitting sound effect, as I think “crunch” would be a bit confusing here as the terrain isn’t completely evident. Added an “are” to the first bubble in panel 5.

>p_092
Neither here nor there, but I appreciate Itoh’s consistency with details. The car Kawabata and Makura are driving his a Hijikata logo on the front, likely from their automotive division.

>p_093
I’m going to guess the sound effect bubbles are the door opening and closing. Mikado’s outfit also looks a little like Corvo/Korvo’s from the early chapters of Monster Collection. Still, I suppose it’s a generic enough “special ops” sort of look to not be a reference, and certainly more modern. That, and Corvo/Korvo is what K’s character build later is based on.

>p_94
To double check, is it a twitch or a sniff in the first panel? I was also having some trouble trying to find something suitable for the sound effect associated with Makura. Closest I can find on TJN would either be “shwipp” (her arms quickly making that pose), or “stand” (her standing up straighter now that she’s away from the car). If the latter, much as I’d like to put “erect” on the idea of straightening out, I figure it’s best we not add a double entendre. Rephrased Mikado’s reaction to feel more like it warrants the question mark at the end of the raw. Using “bristle” again as the recognition sound effect, though his hair’s not visible this time.
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>>104595
Note pages will be soon. Looking for good images.
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>>104596
Took a while to find suitable images for some of this stuff. Too many dead, cooked fish and watermark licensed images out there.

Anyhow, topics for the notes this time:
>Jingisukan and Matsuo Jingisukan
Figured I’d move the margin note describing jingisukan to here, and flow it into discussion about the chain Baku’s going on about. Additionally, I see that the English wikipedia page for jingisukan speculates a bit on the origin of the name, but it looks like the Japanese wikipedia page might go into more depth on it as the "history" section is pretty long. Not sure if there’s a more verifiable origin in Japanese than what the English page lists, but it would be good to know if our description here needs further editing.
>Charlie Chaplin
Western media figure, yeah. But I figure the age of silent films is so far gone by now, that at least a brief description is warranted. Sort of like how "Gertie the Dinosaur" is well known among certain peoples as one of the first animated works ever, but likely not to most average cinema fans these days.
>Director Jissoji’s favorite angle.
>Yoshikawa Eiji and “Every night has its morning.”
Again, it would good to figure out if there’s an established English wording for the quote we should use if it doesn’t interfere with Baku’s followup remark, or if we have freedom to translate it how we want to.
>Asahikawa landmarks.
The now-former Asahikawa Station Building closed in what sounded like 2011, but it would be good to know if passenger business was still in operation there, or if it was just “open” in regard to other businesses. Namely wanting to figure out if the chapter’s implying they took the train and went to eat around the station (which would probably imply Baku rented a car to get to the research lab with), or if they drove and it’s just a coincidental landmark near where they’re eating. That would probably come down to figuring out when this chapter was released in Z Magazine or whatever the first publication they were using was called.
>Hagoromo Falls
>Fishing seasons
Gives readers more potential for possibly determining when this chapter takes place. Similar case with the typhoon in a number chapters (my personal guess would be late September, maybe early October by the time of the typhoon; rainy season in the Yucatan dies down in November).
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>>104670
Noticed some typos:
p_notes_2, paragraph 2:
>You can also find numerous quotes said be him,
Asahikawa city sights:
>While now closed in favor of the "fourth generation" station station nearby to the south
Last paragraph:
>The version seen here is the second generation of the bridge was completed in 1932,
>It also considered a Hokkaido heritage site
p_notes_3, paragraph 2:
>Similar to salmon, they live there lives...
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>>104677
Thanks for helping check those.
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Research and a translation question about Chapter 16:

While the prior English versions had a gutter note for Makura’s “Tsurukametsurukame” (actually, how do we want to transliterate つるかめつるかめ / 鶴亀鶴亀? Hyphen, comma, separate words? Japandict has it as a single word) explaining it as “an intonation to ward off bad luck”, it still didn’t feel like it made much contextual sense in English for the flow of her dialogue. Looking it up, there’s more to it that warrants explanation in English, between the crane and turtle being symbols of good luck and longevity in the east, and invoking them being seen as a way to negate having used an imikotoba (忌み言葉), or situationally taboo word/phrase. Essentially the idea of saying something and jinxing the outcome in English. I do notice that some sites translate it as “knock on wood” or “touch wood”, but I’m not entirely sure we should replace it here when it has such a clear cultural superstitious background.

I feel like I’ve got a good note for it mostly written now (not that it’ll fit in the margin this time), but I’d like to confirm as to where the imikotoba is among what Makura says prior. My assumption is that it’s calling her breasts “lethal weapons” while she’s trying to befriend Mikado (and as later chapters make clear, very pent up and seeing him as action), and trying to negate it like they might indeed kill him somehow, but that’s just my thoughts. The big examples I’ve seen regarding clear imikotoba have been about important events like weddings (words meaning to come apart), funerals (“again and again", "over and over” as in more deaths to come), entrance exams (words meaning failures or falling), and births (words that imply unhealthy babies or miscarriages), but nothing about two enemies becoming allies/friends.
Replies: >>104830
>>104820
(Still working on the previous chapter comments, sorry for taking so long) Makura's "tsurukame tsurukame" comes off as an extension of the joke she made about her breasts being lethal weapons. Meaning-wise, it'd be similar to saying "Better be careful with these" while she's "handling" them, as if they were unstable ordinance. The lines help establish her personality as a constant joker, especially coming right after a combat scene.
I would consider replacing "tsurukame tsurukame" like mentioned above, while explaining the situation in the translation notes; this would make the joke straightforward for casual readers while letting more involved readers in on the specifics. If we're leaving "tsurukame tsurukame" as-is, we could leave a gutter note explaining the joke, but it might get long. I don't think leaving it as-is, then writing only a translation note, would be a good idea since it would only confuse casual readers.
>>104830
>ordinance
ordnance
Replies: >>104848
>>104589
Sorry again for the late reply. Looking over the chapter, you had to do a lot of arranging because of the previous translation changes, and it came out well. Thanks for putting in so much extra work.

066: It looks fine, quick short controlled breaths makes sense to me.

067: It's hard coming up with a sound effect for the ninja-like instant movement going on here. *wssh*, to emphasize the swift movement, or *fwip*, to emphasize the disappearing/reappearing, could work.

069: *slish* is nice.

070: Based on the addition of exclamation marks and the mix of hiragana and katakana, the sound in panel 2 (ぼビュッ!!) is the air being forced out of the guy's lungs after Majira stomps on his lungs through his ribcage, so it should be a very wet exhalation. Perhaps "Bohhew!!" (literal) or "Bleuhh!!" (more relaxed).

073: Changing "we're" to "I'm" works. Here's a clearer version of Mihira's bubbles:
>And while I'm at it, for my former affiliate company...
>a custom-made virus!

074: For the second panel:
>This is Mihira. Everything cleaned up topside?
>I see. Well done.

For the other bubble, she's implying that they finished killing everyone faster than she anticipated, emphasizing her calculating nature.

077: For the second bubble, I agree with the changes. For panel 3:
>Yum!

>Enough already!!
I suspect まいう〜 comes from a famous (for Hokkaido) commercial for Matsuo, but I don't have any proof of that; it could also just be some random guy making the place noisy like you mentioned, so the translation has been changed to be more generally annoyed at everything.

And for panel 4:
>This joke has gone on for too long. I'm running out of patience!!

To clear up the Chaplin quote, we can edit panel 5 to:
>Chaplin once said, "Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot."

078: 松〇尾 is like one tiny black strip placed over a man's penis/woman's vagina in a ero doujin, it's censorship just to follow the rules. The "うん" reads to me as the start of Baku's explanation. To make Mikado's question fit better:
-4-
>So that's why we're eating Jingisukan?

>That's right.

-5-
>For starters, eating from the local land gives you its strength.

>Uhh, sure...

>Eating regularly is important, but...
#if this is too long, "Can't go hungry, but still..." works as well.

Continued in the next post.
Replies: >>104835 >>104848
>>104834
079: The first bubble is almost definitely Baku talking, but it's very confusing because it's connected to Mikado's bubble. Translated as such:
-1-
>You mustn't collapse under the strain of fighting alone.
>Right...

For the second panel, I didn't find an "official" translation. A lot of people have translated the line as the common English saying "It's always darkest before the dawn!", since they basically mean the same thing. If we go with that, then:
-2-
>It's always darkest before the dawn!

>...that's true.

-3-
>The problem is,
>for some people, the darkness lasts longer than their lives.

If we want to stick with "Every night has its morning", then it works as it currently stands.

082: I think "He's eating after all" it's just a little joke about how Mikado was yelling about wasting time but ends up eating regardless.

083: I've heard "cable car" in English. We could change it without any issue.

093: It's the car door, but we could go with *kchk* for the door opening; I think we used that SFX for other doors opening with a ガチャ in later chapters.

094: "Standing ready" is good for ザッ , since it's more of a "presence" noise than an actual movement noise (Makura has moved into a ready stance).

Translation notes:
Jingisukan: I don't think the detail the Japanese entry goes into is necessary here; it notes that the food was claimed to be what Genghis Khan served his forces when abroad (it wasn't), and that people have claimed other mutton dishes were sources (they weren't). It agrees with the English entry saying it actually originated from northeast China in the early 20th century. The entry also talks about how it merged with the term "ジンギスカン鍋" (Jingisukan Hot Pot) despite its grilled nature, but that's going beyond what shows up in the manga anyway.

For the Asahikawa Station Building, the new building opened up partially in November of 2011 and finished construction in March 2012. I don't think there's much to the image beyond it establishing the location as Asahikawa.
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>>104830
>>104832
Alright, I'll go with something like "Better be careful with these" and explain how the original line worked in the notes.

>>104834
>>104835
Thanks for looking over them.

>It's hard coming up with a sound effect for the ninja-like instant movement going on here. *wssh*, to emphasize the swift movement, or *fwip*, to emphasize the disappearing/reappearing, could work.
I like fwip for the short jumping.

>For the other bubble, she's implying that they finished killing everyone faster than she anticipated, emphasizing her calculating nature.
Alright, I'll put that "I" in there to make it more personal to her.

>If we want to stick with "Every night has its morning", then it works as it currently stands.
Being that there isn't an official English version of the quote, I think we should stick with that one there, and I feel like readers can probably make the connection to "It's always darkest before the dawn!" (does make me wonder which came first though, or if it's a universal figure of speech in many cultures). That, and it renders better.

>I've heard "cable car" in English. We could change it without any issue.
Okay.
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>>104848
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>>104849
Also think I found the right tool to try to approximate the intended color palette for the gray tones in Chapter 30 to sync better with the rest of the series, as those pages were output by the publisher in Grayscale instead of RGB, losing the warmth all the other chapters have. Selective Color Adjustment can be designated to target only specific value ranges, and in this case, I can use the “Neutrals” option to just hit the grays without changing the pure black and white values (#000000 and #ffffff respectively). I’ve been using a pair of copies made from the last page of Chapter 29 to experiment with, the first being in the original RGB mode with the proper colors, and the other layered above it having been exported as grayscale to simulate the issue chapter 30 has, and grouped with adjustment layers for easy toggling to visualize palette differences. While I doubt It’s possible to get it exactly 1:1 (converting to grayscale tosses out all color data), I should be able to find settings that get the off color version to a close approximation, and from there we can see how it looks with the adjustment layer duplicated out into chapter 30’s pages.

Still going to take some time as I haven’t actually done this prior, and that there are both four sliders to have to balance (controlling CMYK individually, from -100% to +100% for each) as well as relative vs absolute colormetric options, but I think it’s definitely worth exploring. Even this initial draft (pic 3; Cyan -42%, Magenta -36%, Yellow -35%, and Black +27%; relative) looks a lot better than the grayscale one.
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>>104850
A further refined adjustment layer (C -50%, M -46%, Y -45%, B +50%, Relative) created using p_156 seems to work pretty well for similar pages with mostly gray shades in Chapter 30. I do feel like it's apt to need some further tweaking for some of the pages with more white on them, but it's going to take some more comparison. If so, it could be as simple as knocking the Cyan/Red slider back up a percent or two (it's a main contributor to adding back the warmer grays), but it could take something more significant. I'll keep working on it during downtime.

I'm using a duplicated folder of chapter 30's raw pages for this now, so the originals will always still available for use if needed. If everything can be made into something I feel is cohesive, not just between the pages here, but also in regard to chapter 29 before and 31 afterward, I'll make a zip of the "fixed" raws for anons to preview.
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>>104380
>>104381
Going to go ahead and post work for chapter 16:
No spreads this chapter. Got a fair amount of sound effects though. The “げ!” on p_098, panel 4 could use clearing. The first panel of p_101’s “ビッ”also seems reasonable to clear, as well as the “パン” in panel 3. “ゾクッ” in the last panel of p_102, the “ザッ” between panels 1 and 2 on p_106, and the “スゥ” in panel 1 of p_107. Lastly, the sound effects in panels 6 and 7 on p_123 could use clearing. Let me know if you need English overlays for any of these.
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>>104929

>>104830
Also, I figure I might ask now, regarding Makura's Kansai accent, it's certainly possible for me to go from here forward and adjust her lines if you want to incorporate that directly (if so, I could use some examples of elements to convey it). If not, we can still leave it to a note about her speaking like that, but it seems like it would be a good idea to include with it what a good analogue for it in English would be regardless, as far as helping readers better understand the difference between it and standard Japanese. I've seen some describe it as a mixture of "Texan" country and "Jersey" industrial, or Cockney/Scouse for UK English, but part of me wonders if those are indeed the most apt comparisons, or have more to do with talent (or "talent") local to the area where dubbing companies are located.
>>104931
"How do you translate accents?" has been a big question in fan translations for a very long time, and everyone's got a different answer. I'm going to discuss my take on it, but I'd like to hear your opinion too, since this is a group effort and we've got a lot of pages going forward.

The Kansai accent has many different aspects to it: a casual attitude, a streetwise attitude, a money-hungry attitude, a comedic attitude, a preference for some foods, etc. Unfortunately, there is no perfect equivalent in English accents: the common two American replacements are Texan and Bostonian, both of which fit some but not other aspects (casual but not comedic, streetwise but not money-hungry). This presents a major hurdle to accent translating.

It's possible to get around this hurdle by focusing only on the part that the author actually uses for the character. In our case, Makura's accent mainly serves to emphasize her casual and comedic attitude. We also have the advantage of having read the entire series, so we know she isn't money-hungry or crazy about specific Kansai foods. So theoretically, we could use a similar English-speaking accent and call it a day, but I'd still be against it.

That's because it is actually pretty hard to "write" an accent in English strong enough for people to notice. If Makura has a Texan accent, how exactly do you make sure her accent is strong enough? Will she end up saying "y'all" every chapter? Or if we went with Bostonian, would she end all her -er words with -ah, like "theatah" or "chowdah"? If you don't do it enough, people feel like it's fake- or even think it's a spelling error!- but if you do it too much, it's a nightmare of mangled sentences. I can't imagine turning all of her sentences into Cockney, it'd become illegible for the vast majority of English readers.

So I suggest doing something else: we emphasize the character traits the accent was meant to portray with standard English. Makura's a casual and comedic sort, so we can throw in a few apostrophes ("walking" -> "walkin'") and light slang ("going to" -> "gonna") and get much closer without having to worry about everything else I've mentioned. It's readable for all the various forms of English out there, it's easier on the translators, and it only falls apart once in the entire series (a gag panel in Chapter 33). We can use gutter notes or translation notes to cover that. This is more or less what we went with in the first run, and I think it mostly worked out.

Anyway, that was a wall of text; let me know what you think.
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>>104967
>So I suggest doing something else: we emphasize the character traits the accent was meant to portray with standard English. Makura's a casual and comedic sort, so we can throw in a few apostrophes ("walking" -> "walkin'") and light slang ("going to" -> "gonna") and get much closer without having to worry about everything else I've mentioned. It's readable for all the various forms of English out there, it's easier on the translators, and it only falls apart once in the entire series (a gag panel in Chapter 33). We can use gutter notes or translation notes to cover that. This is more or less what we went with in the first run, and I think it mostly worked out.

That works for me, though I do think a few example sentences in the notes could help to showcase the difference for reading the lines mentally, as well as mentioning some specific grammatical or syntax related “tells” for if people are listening to Japanese audio. Makura using “Uchi” as her chosen pronoun, “ya” in place of “da”, and “seya” in place of “souya” for instance. There’s also the examples of her using “-han” to address Gen and Majira in place of “-san”, but we can just have that as a gutter/margin note when it happens. I'll also mention how no accent in English quite gets the full feel across that Japanese readers get from it too, at least when it comes to text. Those are my thoughts on it.

On a related note, I forget, was Makura confirmed to be from the Kansai area and thus would have picked up the dialect naturally in living there, or is she just a case where the casual and joking attributes associated with it are simply being further emphasized in her speaking that way? I suppose at the very least, Kouya takes place in Japan in part, so it’s not just a character using a Kansai accent when the Kansai region doesn’t even exist in their world (albeit perhaps an analogue does).

>that was a wall of text
You don’t know the half of it; discovered something rather interesting earlier as far as Itoh and Baku stretching historical connections a bit in a later chapter goes. Wouldn’t say it amounts to a whole lot in the long run, but knowing where reality ends and fiction begins for the scenario imparts more meaning which I think they were trying to give the situation, for Japanese readers who were aware of the figures mentioned anyhow. That’s come out to be a wall of text in its own right. Will copypasta it from a text document later for consideration, once I finish looking it over more.
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>>104970
While comparing the adjusted chapter 30 pages with ones with similar levels of grey/linework in other chapters, I noticed that title page for Houzan in chapter 21, and felt like there could be more behind the armor he’s wearing. A few points did stand out, namely that he’s wearing a facemask with no helmet to go with it and lacking a weapon, but also that his chestpiece seems to be both a “nanban do” (late European-style plate body) as well as having a pair of mon or monsho on it. I figured these could well be some sort of flower with a large central point compared to the petals, but it also seemed possible that they could be a pair of “Kuyo-mon” (九曜巴), or “Nine Star Crest”, an image that has an association with the Hindu Navagraha. Japanese warlords and samurai liked it for the religious symbolism, but warriors in general also liked it, seeing it as representing the “The Nine Paths of the Sword” – the two forms of vertical strike, two forms of horizontal strike, two forms of each diagonal strike, and the central sword thrust.

This is its own can of worms, and isn’t inherently the point I’m meaning to bring up now, as I think the whole “what kind of armor is all that” needs more research. But as crests have meaning and can be tied to families, I figured I’d take another look at Houzan’s family tree, and see if any of the family names there had a tie to a flower or kuyo crest, or if perhaps Houzan might have essentially picked it for himself. Of the names involved (Miyamoto, Togo, Yakumaru), the Miyamoto family crest was a “tomoe” or “mitsudomoe” (triple comma/magatama) crest, but also had a “nine-fold” version of the same sort of arrangement as the aforementioned Nine Star Crest. Being white-on-black, and with a clear design in each circle, I didn’t think that was the one Itoh was getting it, as he would have likely detailed that.
http://www.miyamotomusashi.eu/clan/musashis-family-crest/index.html

Togo seems to use a flower of some sort, while nothing came up for Yakumaru. However, Miyamoto Musashi had a patron in the form of Hosokawa Tadatoshi, and the Hosokawa Clan did use the Nine Star Crest as their monsho, so I thought maybe it could stem from that, if nothing more direct
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hosokawa_clan

As it turns out, it seems to have association with the Jigen-ryu of his ancestor Togo Shigekata, by way of its creation mixing the advantages and elements of the Taisha-ryu and Tenshinsho-Jiken-ryu styles into it, with the Nine Star Crest having also been the Taisha-ryu’s symbol. Some of the elements from all of these, as well as the Yakumaru-Jigen-ryu, like postures and strikes, might also be worth looking into the descriptions of, in case Houzan uses actual techniques in the manga. Considering he uses actual Buddhist posturing when not fighting, I wouldn’t put it past Itoh to have at least some of the combat be real too. That said, it seems like the incarnation there is “black-on-background-color”, whereas the title page for the manga has it as white, or rather, the same color as the plate body. Were monsho engraved/molded/pressed into armor, or painted on/attached? If the former, then it would make sense to be the same color. Either way, perhaps the mixture of the armor pieces without a weapon, and use of a "component" school's symbol, is a similar bit of symbolism to the chapter at hand, with young-Houzan being open to combining the best of different ways of fighting.
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>>104970
>>104977
That aside, my research into the above did provide some more information from looking at the raw family tree for the kanji to search people’s names with. Not only was Miyamoto Musashi a real person (obviously), but so were about a third of the people listed there, though Itoh and Baku chose to use some apparently less-than-common forms of some of their names:
>Togo Tobe Shigetaka (東郷藤兵衛重位)
Togo’s middle name (I thought Japanese didn’t use those?) should apparently be romanized as “Tobei” going off Japanese wikipedia. Additionally, while Itoh has it spelled “Shigetaka” in the furigana on the page, everything I’ve seen suggests “Shigekata”. Not sure if this was intentional to avoid confusion with his son below, or just an accidental typo.
>Yakumaru Kanenobu (薬丸兼陳)
Kanenobu seems to perhaps be an alternative reading of the name’s kanji. “Kenchin” (けんちん) seems to be the more popular one, and the nickname he went by.
>Yakumaru Kanefuku (薬丸兼福)
Japanese wikipedia gives his personal name as having been “Kanetomi”, Kanefuku was his nickname. Blood son of Kanenobu.
>Kanetaka (兼隆)
This seems to refer to Yakumaru Kanetake (薬丸兼武), who was adopted into the Yakumaru family by Kanenobu and was the one to inherit the family. Kanetaka was apparently his birth name, he was the first master of Kanenobu’s Yakumaru Jigen-ryu, and apparently the one who reported to the world that Kanenobu was its founder (from which it sounds like he may not have actually been?). I didn’t see anything about him changing his name to “Yakushimaru”, but I’ll touch on that in a bit.
>Shigekata (重方)
Spoken the same as his father’s first name, but spelled with different kanji (Guessing this is like “[X] Jr.” in languages with phonetic yet idea-oriented writing systems). Refers to Togo Shigekata (東郷重方).

That’s where the real world figures end. The rest of the characters are all fictional. While Togo Tobei Shigekata had three daughters, none of them were married to Musashi, let alone named Sana (in fact, they’re seemingly only listed in history as being wives to “Kitago Kuri” (北郷久利), “Wada Masasada” (和田正貞), and “Hori Yoshinobu” (堀興延) individually, without their own names having been recorded). Musashi himself never had any kids either, and instead adopted four kids/people to be his children. As to Kanetake, he was eventually declared a heretic by the rest of the clan, exiled to the island of Yakushima, and died in 1835 at the age of 60. Apparently the issue stemmed from him having two or three disciples to the Togo family submit oaths under the name of Josuiden (如水伝); “Josui” having been a pseudonym of Kanenobu. This move of independence apparently drew the ire of Togo Sanekata, who didn’t appreciate the little stunt, but due to financial issues, took almost three decades to get things in order to banish Kanetake. And no, Yakushimaru and Yakushima are spelled differently (薬師丸 vs 屋久島) and just sound partially alike.
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>>104978
This is just my take here, but I feel like the differences from history are telling their own story here to anyone aware of who the real people are. To me, it suggests that in Kouya’s universe, “Kanetaka” changed his family name from Yakumaru to Yakushimaru after being exiled (in which case, the in-frame note on that ought to be cleared up, as it doesn’t clearly state it was his family name that he changed) and perhaps lived on past 60. Musashi had no blood related offspring on record, nor were any of the Togo Tobei Shigekata’s daughters mentioned as being his wife, so I would expect her dad likely disowned her as a result of shaming the family, and I guess Musashi didn’t stick around either. “Toki” is the fictional daughter, and her getting with “Kanetaka” I’m guessing would have been quite late in his life. And from there things lead to Houzan being a “Yakushimaru” in the future, as some sort of “bastard child”/disowned lineage neither the Yakumaru, Miyamoto, or Todo wanted to associate their names with, yet he’s still proud about the happenings that led to him. At least, that’s what I assume to be the full takeaway Itoh and Baku intended from that little chart, for those who know their swordfighting history.

Anyhow, I’m thinking that the actual historical figures and their relevance are worth some notes when the time comes, along with correcting some spellings where needed. I’ve also gone ahead and fixed up the typography for the page here, as well as added “Genshin” back into Musashi’s full name as it’s listed in Japanese. The family tree going all the way back to late 1500s might also explain Makura’s reaction being written with a ゑ, since that looks to be an archaic kana.

I also found this when trying to make sure there was no historical source for Yakushimaru Ansui. Some story called “Lamenting Dragon” or something (慟哭の龍). I wager it has nothing to do with the actual work, but what even it this? A web novel? Or did I find the Japanese equivalent to fanfiction.net?
https://syosetu.org/novel/303822/20.html
Replies: >>104983
>>104970
We can put together a short "Kansai dialect differences" note if desired. Writing Japanese dialects in Japanese is much easier than writing English dialects in English due to the nature of the language (the various gobi (語尾) examples you provided, as well as the strict pronunciation of the Japanese alphabet, make it far easier to get an accent across without mangling readability).

>>104977
>>104978
>>104979
That's a lot of good detail into the historical fiction of Musashi's children. Given his immense popularity, I suppose these invented branches off historically accurate family trees are well-established in Japanese fiction. As an aside, syosetu.org is indeed a major website for Japanese fanfiction; several light novel authors got their start from there, so it's packed to the gills with all sorts of stories.
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>>104849
Went ahead and got Chapter 15 zipped and archived.

>>104380
>>104381
You around, anon? No rush on >>104929 >>104931 if you’ve been busy lately, just that a check-in would be nice.

>>104983
More research:
While working on Chapter 30’s adjustments, I’ve discovered that, in trying to confirm if Houzan’s listing off of various legends/tales surrounding Tanzawa (p_170 of Volume 5) have any real life basis, they seem to instead relate to other, earlier works by Yumemakura Baku instead. The one about “the ladybug who yearns for a heart” (こころほしてんとうむし) is a blatant reference to a book or novel of Baku’s that was published in 1985, called “Kokoro-Hoshi Tentoumushi” (こころほし てんとう虫). The other two tales are a bit less easy to find, though regarding the boy with a cryptid/mythical beast (幻獣) living within him, Baku has a few books using that raw term, in “”Genjyu Henge” (幻獣変化) and “Genjyu Shonen Chimera” (幻獣少年キマイラ). The former is the first book in a series apparently called “King of Nirvana” (涅槃の王), and the genjyu from the title are apparently mythical beasts that roam the land, according to an Amazon page. The latter though is the first book in the “Chimera Kou” (キマイラ・吼) series, and what little Japanese wikipedia gives for it says that the main character, Ootori Kou’s, body holds a "mystery" within it. None of the kanji regarding the  “religious cult orgy rituals” matches with any specific title I've seen, though a description of his “Majugari: Inraku-hen” (魔獣狩り 淫楽編) sounds relevant, with the Japanese wikipedia page describing it as blending esoteric Buddhism, sex, violence, and the occult.

I can’t confirm this stuff solely from that information though, so if you could look for some information as to whether Kokoro Hoshi Tentomushi, Genjyu Shonen Chimera, and Majugari: Inraku-hen take place at least in part within Tanzawa, that would help with that immensely. Additionally, if you could find out what sort of mysterious creature is supposed to be within Ootori Kou’s (大鳳吼) body, that would also help with determining whether 幻獣 should indeed be “cryptid”, or if it should instead be “mythical beast”, or perhaps a more literal "phantom beast" if it doesn't match well with any of the former two, in English.
>>104983
>>105583
Also, if you can find any sort of description of こころほしてんとう虫, even in brief, that would be very helpful for providing a little more context. Part of me wonders if, with the cover looking like that, it has any relation to that "Orurorane the Cat Player" book/ova we made a note about for chapter 5.
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>>104929
I've finished. I cleared the effect from panel 2 of p_102 in case it was getting replaced, because it was touching the panel border.
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>>104931
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>>105608
>>105609
Those work great, thanks as always. I'll try to have the roughs finalized in a few days for QA.
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So I found a dump of the original Kodansha Kouya volume 1-9 set, and spent the night downloading it. I was hoping that, even if the pages weren’t at the right dimensions, Chapter 30 there could at least help serve as confirmation of how the color palette should have naturally looked. Unfortunately, it looks like it was scanned and/or saved out using Grayscale mode as well; not just that one chapter as in the Takuma Shoten set, but this entire set of Kodansha scans. At the very least though, looking at other mistakes from Takuma Shoten’s set not present in Kodansha’s, and from the way RGB to Grayscale conversion works (all colors besides black, white, and neutral gray are completely discarded from the file data if saved), I feel completely certain that Chapter 30 was meant to look as warm as the rest.

Beyond that though, downloading it wasn’t a complete loss. In addition to having some better quality scans of the few color pages, there’s also a handful of pieces of promotional art not available to Takuma Shoten, some of which look really damn cool, and both of which we could tack on to the end of the series revision like the original Kodansha covers the first time around. Also some other stuff like relevant ads (there’s a spread promoting both Kouya and Psycho Divers being in the same magazine/publisher, which were both written by Baku but drawn by two different Itohs), and various artwork of Baku (that is, his artist caricature, not the in-universe character) as some Acala-like figure, or eating with Sharaku. I guess he had a pair of books of his own that were current then (格闘的日常生活 and 続・格闘的日常生活) that were likewise being promoted as Kodansha was the publisher there as well.

Beyond those though, there’s also would could effectively be another omake, or “special contribution” as they put it here, which might be interesting to translate as a bonus for readers, as while the scan quality isn’t where I’d want it to be, I could easily recreate it as it uses similar formatting to the ones in Takuma Shoten’s set, and the images are just crops from actual pages. I’ll let >>104983 give it a reading through, and see if it just covers the same ground as one/more of the Takuma Shoten ones, or actually explores new information first though.

Also seems like by Volume 6 being print, Kodansha might have known Magazine Z was going under, as they stopped listing their catalog in the back at that point.
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>>105619
Might as well post the rest of the promotional art while I'm at it, if anyone's curious.
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>>105620
>>105583
>>105584
>>105619
Translator here, making a "I'm not dead" post. I'll work on the Chapter 30 research as well as get into the newly found あとがき (at first glance, it appears to be new and at least a little amusing), but real-life fatigue has hit me pretty hard so I can't promise anything soon. Of course, upcoming chapters (and TWOMR if that ever starts up again) get priority, but this will also get attention.
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>>105690
Don’t sweat it, and take your time with it. Spent a long time last year feeling utterly drained myself. Plus, I got a bit distracted myself this week after finally finding some decent raws for Itoh’s Monster Collection. They’ll work more than fine as crops for notes images as needed, but even I can tell from a glance between them and the old English scanlation that Anime Waves did a terrible job translating it. “Perfect Edition”, my ass. Anyhow, here’s a link to a backup I made of the raws if you or anyone else want more Itoh to read, even just for fun:
https://mega.nz/file/JBtSnCCK#sKk8BIqpg6-_k9YbYCSqIGrOBivrCXglU08Ajq-6oao

His and Baku's latest collaboration also looks to have its firstraw  volume on Nyaa as of earlier this year as well. Seems to be an adaptation of one of the most popular Onmyoji arcs, "Takiyasha-hime", which was actually adapted before by another artist (Mutuski Munko) but I guess Itoh wanted to take a crack at it too:
https://nyaa.si/view/1755240
Just figured I'd give an update on having found material relating to other series of theirs, as in the previous thread.
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Sorry for the wait. Been feeling under the weather myself lately.

On the old topic of confirming which unspecified manga Itoh and his wife were speaking about in the Makura omake, I have managed to encounter online not just the English DC Comics/CMX brand cover for Monster Collection, but also ones for the other languages Itoh brought up:
>French: Kazé Editions
>German: Carlsen Verlag GmbH
>Italian: Planet Manga
>Spanish: Norma Editiorial
I suspect that we’re not apt to find scans of them, and trying to confirm that they are indeed more accurate seems like it might be asking a bit much. That said, I’m just content to have more proof that Monster Collection is indeed the work they were discussing. Perhaps he couldn't explicitly name it due to licensing issues, as it was originally published by Kadokawa.

Now, as far as English goes, the physicals are long out of print (and range like $15 to $50 each depending on volume, looking at ebay), and only volume 5 (of six) seems to have accessible scans we can double check online. It’s an hour length “library” rental only on Archive.org, so that requires an account, which I do have. In any case, while it might not have the best or worst examples of there work, I assume we can take what’s there as representative. I’ll dig through it soon to put together a roster of character name spellings and see if there’s anything that seems like a Christian interpretation of what was originally a polytheistic worldview.

In any case though, the English version having been published by CMX’s brand, I can very much see them having fucked around with it. Research suggests they got some infamy among manga fans in the mid-2000s for their edits and censorship of Tenjho Tenge (to use their spelling) in the name of getting it a wider audience. As it is now, I can already see from the archive preview pages they opted to translate コルボ as “Cuervo”, which while having the same relation as Corvo/Corbo (the character came up with the psuedonym while looking at a crow or raven; apparently 暗兵 don’t have any true names, going off the Japanese wiki), I’m not sure why they switched from an Italian name to Spanish.

Anyhow, onto Chapter 16’s roughs:
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>>105948
>p_095
Moved the title up and left a little bit to provide more breathing room between the text and Makura.

>p_096
Sound effect of the wind blowing, but I have to wonder if that’s the best way to put it as the sort of “prelude to violence” sound like is seen in movies and such.

>p_097
Rephrased the third bubble to read a bit easier.

>p_098
“Dodging… Forward?” to “Dodging… Toward me!?” to provide a bit more context. The sound effect in panel 4 seems more like an annoyed exclamation than a standard sound, so I figured I’d handle it as one. To double check the intent with the last panel, does it come off as Mikado trying to destabilize Makura with the motion, or intentional set up for the strike in the first panel of the next page? I assume the latter rather than two separate strategies, but figured I’d double check, as I see ブン could also be taken as him trying to shake her off him.
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>>105949
>p_100
Trying to figure out the best interpretation of the background sound effect in the first panel. Looking up ゴッ on TJN suggests something like “Roar” but it’s not clear if Makura is speaking this noise. Visually, it looks more like a sound for the spin itself, yet there’s already a “Hyuu!” as the noise in front of it. Rephrased the thoughts in panel 4 to read better, looking at the raw for better context. Also had some trouble trying to figure the best way to put the sound of Mikado blocking the quick strikes in panel 5.

>p_101
Rephrased the text in panel 1 and 2. I’m guessing the sound effect in panel 1 is the mask ripping?

>p_103
Just the double check, do we still want to translate “この野郎!!” as “I got you, asshole!” If so, I’d rephrase it to “I got you now, asshole!!” Let me know if there’s a more preferred way to handle Makura’s response there. The previous English version just left it like that from the raw.

>p_104
Not entirely sure of the best way to handle the sound effects in the third panel here. It comes off like Mikado lost his footing, while Makura intentionally pushed off.
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>>105950
>p_105
You looking at the flow of the bubbles on this page, we’ve got two thoughts and an exclamation. The raw text also suggests that the exclamation is interrupting the train of thought, I’m guessing the original thought Mikado was having was meant to end in a “nai” (しめた!自由落下なら逃げ道はない), only for his confusion to cut that off as he only vocally says “な!?” With that all in mind, I don’t think the original English page’s “I got you in a free fall now! // You can’t // esca-!?” really works, as Mikado wouldn’t suddenly start saying “escape” with no other sentence structure. As such, I’ve tried playing around with the text some to see if it’s possible to better incorporate the difference in text rendering and bubble types. My best thought is to shift the term “escape” to “get out of the way”, since the context is less about Makura being unable to flee and more unable to dodge with nothing to change her momentum. Thus, I thought I’d try “There we go! If you’re caught in free fall, // you can’t get out of the w- // What!?” Granted, I don’t know if this would work better without the “w-” in the second bubble and just end on the “the” instead, in terms of smoothness of word transition and not feeling like the bottom of the text frame is cutting a word off. Regardless, let me know what you guys think. Also, to double check, do the sound effects within panel 4 come off as a single sound (ゴトン) or two different ones (ゴ, トン)?Trying to figure out if I need to put another one on the page or not.

P_106
Rephrased Mikados thoughts a bit here to read and render better. Honestly not the easiest chapter for this sort of thing in terms of Mikado’s avoidance of assumption as to whether his opponent is male or female working okay for Japanese but not so much in English. Granted, it’s pretty evident to the reader from the title page, but maybe not to him thus far.

>p_107
Guessing that the sound effect in the first panel is supposed to represent something like tension/strength building up? Part of me wants to use “I’m going to take this guy in…” since Mikado’s plan has been to snatch someone from the place and make them talk, but I’m not sure if that sounds a bit too, for lack of a better word, “cop-y”, and where’s he going to drag his victim off to anyway? Back to Baku’s car? Or Baku’s house back in Odawara? Opted for “grab this guy”. Rephrased the bubble in panel 3. “right!?” to “aren’t you!?” in the third bubble in panel 5 to render better.

>p_108
“really wants to talk” in panel 1 makes it come off more one-sided, whereas Makura’s trying to negotiate. Rephrased to “My boss really wants to speak with you!” Reworded Mikado’s remark about a Dokkaku Soldier’s body being their own weapon. Glancing at the raw before when trying to get more information on “tsurukame”, it seemed more like she was agreeing with Mikado’s assessment with the “む〜んせやなァ”. Rephrased her bubbles around that, and redid the note to mention the joke being explained in detail on the notes pages, since we’re no longer using “Tsurukame tsurukame” in the main script here. “Is that” in panel 5 to “Are they”; “smell” to “scent” in Mikado’s response.

>p_109
Rephrased Makura’s second bubble in panel 1. Added the pause to the start of Mikado’s line from the raw into the English. Mikado’s second bubble in panel 2 doesn’t feel like it needs both “and” and “too” in it. Added a “they were” to Makura’s first bubble in panel 4. “a little bit” to “a little” in the last panel.
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>>105952
>p_110
I notice that the second bubble isn’t the usual “yoroshiku” as a greeting. Is that “あんじょうよろしゅうに” just a standard equivalent in Kansai, or is she saying something different there? I mean, while to Mikado, this surely feels like the first time they’ve met, at least to his memory, to Makura, it’s probably more like meeting an old friend or at least coworker again, even if they might not have been close before. So maybe something more like “Please (keep) treat(ing) me well!” instead?

>p_111
“maybe even more” in panel 1 to “maybe even more-so”. “It is exactly as” in panel 4 to “It’s just as”. “But that we mean you no harm” in the last panel to “More that we mean you no harm. Also, this is more my curiosity than anything, but what’s with Kawabata using 我々 instead of 私たち when he uses 私 for himself? Can one just change between their choice of pronoun like that, or does it mean something more?

>p_112
Rephrased the first bubble a bit. The way Kawabata introduces himself in the last panel makes it seem like he either feels Mikado should recognize him, or at least that he’s aware Mikado would come after him eventually. I’d suggest rephrasing it to “It’s me, // Kawabata Souichirou.”

>p_114
In panel 2, I thought I thought I’d ask a friend for some advice on where to break the previous lines between the two bubbles to read easiest, and was asked in turn how the raw worded it. Looking over the lines there (土方グループ総帥に妾腹の隠し子がいたくらいで 話題になるほど // 今の世相はニュース不足じゃありませんよ), the previous “The Hijikata Group’s leader having a bastard son isn’t much of a story // in today’s news-filled society.” felt rather off the mark, as from what I can tell, it’s not just not old news, but a current scandal, which puts a different tone on their relationship if you ask me. Like, Gen’s not exactly a (totally?) unwanted or disliked son, given he does have a job working in the family business, but more that his presence isn’t welcome there for the time being, until things cool down in the media. I’ve given retranslating the lines a shot here, but let me know if you can think of better wording. “I think” at the end of the bubble in panel 3 to “if you ask me”. Though, I suppose I might ask, does Gen’s father come off as formal with his speech, even when being critical? I notice on the next page that he’s using “儂” (washi) as a pronoun; does that represent something that ought to be reflected elsewhere in his speech, even if we still have to use “I” or “me” in English? Rephrased the bubbles in the last panel a little bit to render better.
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>>105953
>p_115
The second line, “Yakushimaru Houzan has betrayed us.” certainly flows well, but it doesn’t render very nicely in terms of a manga bubble compared to standard book-style body text in English, which I suppose in part explains Sparrow’s previous rendering as three lines with quite small text compared to the raw. For the sake of comparison, it would take reducing the text width to 60% to render as three lines at the proper font size scale we’ve established. It’s doable, but looks pretty skinny. The other option I might suggest is “Yakushimaru Houzan has turned traitor on us.” which better utilizes the bubble space without needing to adjust the width. If you want, I can crop an example of it for comparison. The phone ringing in panels 3 and 4 feels like it has a low tone to me, compared to other phone ringtones I’ve seen in manga. Might want to double check it. “…uh huh.” in panel 5 feels a bit odd from Gen’s dad, like with “うむ”, it should be something more terse, like a “Yes.” or perhaps some sort of grunt of acknowledgment (IE: “Nnn.”). Rephrased the first bubble in panel 6; I have to wonder if “Got it” works best for Gen’s dad compared to “Understood” for “分かった”. Debating on if it’s worth making a note of the use of “儂”; it seems like while it’s used these days for stereotypically old men in fiction, it has its roots among the elderly in Kansai and Kyoto. Is there anything about his speech to suggest that’s the region the family is from, or does it feel more like it’s just being used to the former effect here? “Makoto is coming.” to “Makoto is on his way.”

>p_116
In panel 2, “in the lab was” to “at the lab were”. Added an “even” to Makoto’s first bubble in panel 3. With the second bubble in panel 4, Gen’s line seems a bit at odds with his manner. Is he really remarking that controlling the Dokkaku soldiers at the lab was his job, or is more like “they’re too strong for me (us? IE: the security force) to have taken down”? First bubble in panel 5 also feels odd, at least in terms of flow of discussion from the previous panel. Figured I’d make a note later for the snack Gen’s having, as apparently dango are popularly served alongside tea, as in the ceremony they seem to be having.

>p_117
Given that a “smart dog” would likely be more apt to rebel, I thought I’d take a look at “能カ値の高い犬”from the raw. I’d suggest “highly capable dogs” or “highly skilled dogs”, though it also seems like “能カ値” is a term associated with video games; something like a character’s stats or parameters? Either way, it seems to be ubiquitous enough in japan that it doesn’t need furigana to understand, yet doesn’t show up in Japandict. Either way, the idea doesn’t seem to be “smart” as in “intelligent” (but not dumb either), but capable of performing hard tasks. Panel 2 seems to suggest more that it’s that wolves hate being controlled that leads to them not being suited for the battlefield, rather than an additional reason against them. Additionally, I might ask, should “首輪” be translated accurately as collar here, or does Japan use the idea of, say, “dog in a collar” as we do in English for “dog on a leash”? I mean, I get that the overall effect is the same, but is the phrasing indeed analogous? “Does your opinion to “do your views” in panel 3. Rephrased bubbles 3 and 4 in panel 4; rephrased bubble 1 a bit in panel 5.

>p_118
“was” in panel 1 would imply that they’re not still funding Godal; rephrased to “It’s Cherubim.” Putting a note in the notes page about which real world family each listed name is a riff on, as well as the imagery on the page (being that what most people think cherubim are is wrong, and are instead called “putti”; Itoh and Baku have it right here).
Replies: >>105955 >>105957
>>105954
Previous post text was too long.

>p_119
Rephrased the first bubble. “pulling out overseas” just sounds weird, especially since Pajra and Indra are on their way back home; reworded to “shipping out overseas”. Rephrased the first bubble in panel 2 to sound more natural. “the Pentagon ends” in panel 3 to “the Pentagon is over”; “those two” to “the two of them” in the next bubble. Added a “then” to the old man’s text, as he’s replying to Gen, not the one having spoken thus far on the page. Rephrased the second bubble in panel 4 around the corrected dokkaku soldier names. The bubble following it comes off quite oddly in the prior English. Is there anything to suggest that someone else is going to transport the corpses to the lab, or is the implication Gen and his crew are going to do so themselves?
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>>105954
>>105955
>p_120
Rephrased Gen’s insult of the Dokkaku soldiers a bit more around the topic of them being beasts (“bunch of” to “pack”). “I will contact you” in panel 4 to “I shall contact you” to render better. Reimplemented Makoto’s stammer to the first bubble in panel 5; added an “any” to further” in the second bubble. To double check, the second sound effect in panel 6 seems almost like Gen’s sighing, but is there something more appropriate that it might be? Though I’d double check it.

>p_122
Checking the raw lines, it seems more like Gen’s first bubble is speaking in terms of the future, while second is him saying that the concert begins now, rather than it having started already. Perhaps he hasn’t considered his plans really being in motion until now (IE: maybe prior, the chaos had just worked out to his advantage). Either way, I’d recommend rephrasing them to something like “The world will sing to my rhythm… // So now, let the concert begin!!” Just my thoughts though.

Will get the notes output once I find suitable images. Topics I’ve thought for this time:
>”I’d better be careful with them”/”Tsurukame-tsurukame”:
>Makura’s accent/Kansai dialect
>Mako-chan as a nickname/differences in intended name readings
>”Kyofu” on the wall scroll
>Explanation of dango, and it’s role in tea ceremonies.
>Cherubim’s members and imagery
>A quick definition of The Pentagon, for non-North American English readers.
Replies: >>106419
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Apologies, got busy doing some more research lately, which I’ll present later (turned out quite well, for the most part). Trying to finish up the notes and their images now. I do have a few questions though that would make more sense to ask here, given the Makura/Makora issue that the topic of “Mako-chan” brings up. Namely, I’d like to confirm if there’s any clear reason behind Itoh and Baku having used the Sanskrit names they opted to. While I see a correlation between most of the names and Sanskrit ones given on the Twelve Divine Generals page at Onmark Productions (Majira and Sandira aside; they still seem to be called Anila and Sandilya), they don’t match with the Sanskrit listings on the English wikipedia page for the Twelve Divine Generals. Meanwhile, the Japanese wikipedia page for 十二神将 does indeed have all of the given English names spelled out under the “Sanskrit Name” column of the chart there (pic related), but most of the generals actually bear two names in Sanskrit there. 

So what was the likely reason or source that Itoh and Baku chose the English Sanskrit readings from there that they did, and why? I see the superscript "[2]" on each, which is given a source of 『天部の仏像事典』90頁 (something like "Encyclopedia of Heavenly Buddhist Statues, p. 90") at the bottom of the page, but is there something to that to actually make that book authoritative on the subject regarding Sanskrit when so many other resources I've found don't mention either some or all of the names Itoh and Baku gave for English? And what’s the difference in factor between two different Sanskrit names being a thing and which is used when? How do both Majira and Anila exist as romanized readings of the Sanskrit (at least the others’ variations seem sort of similar). I know this probably comes across as perhaps making it bigger than it needs to be. I just want to make sure to have correct evidence to back up the matter of intent of name versus the differing names across various eastern cultures, and haven’t been able to find clear answers from an English perspective.

Given the differences given between the 読み for the Japanese kanji and 片仮名 for the romanized Sanskrit, I should probably fix the pronunciation guide note for Kumbhira in chapter 1 to better reflect what’s given for the latter.

Second, given the Hijikata’s are having a traditional tea ceremony, is there specific type of dango that is preferred to eat at those? Gen’s eating one, and I saw that they are often served alongside green tea, so it makes sense for the scene, furthering the aside about Gen practicing proper tea ceremony etiquette, so they clearly take it seriously. There’s a lot of various types of dango from what I can see though, so I thought I’d ask if there one that’s preferred for those events. I suspect that it’s at least not a hanami dango due to the setting, nor cha dango (at least, I’d think a green tea flavored dango served with green tea would be redundant).
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>"hmm, this thread looks neat; I'll look through the archives"
>like six threads across five years and multiple image boards
Fucking hell, good job for sticking through it.

What made you want to start this in the first place? I recall reading the first dozen chapters of this on Mangadex before they made their interface extremely gay and it seemed like snappy, good English.
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>>106146
Think it was more like eight or nine threads, with some not having been properly archived. Can’t remember if the archive trail from the OPs goes all the way back to the very first one, but if not and you're curious, here:
https://archive.ph/AdLFK
I joined up a good bit later, but from what I can tell, basically a mixture of an anon providing ready access to the entire series in much better visual quality than was available prior, an enjoyable art style and interesting story, some anons already being Itoh fans anyway, and having the right people with the right skills at the right times to keep it all going to the end. Figure it was also helpful to know right off the bat that the series had survived its original magazine getting axed and reaching a proper conclusion in Japan, despite an additional two years in forced hiatus there between chapter 55 and 56. I can only imagine what a waste it must feel like for people scanlating currently active series only to find that the Japanese publisher is shitcanning it was meant to finish, at least if it has an ongoing story.

If you mean the current revamp, it’s been in large part inspired by legibility issues of the older chapters I've noticed when going back to check recalled lines when working on the later chapters; typesetting not being as effective as it ought to be, typos, etc. Also lack of proper page spread stitches, missed references. As we’ve dug through it again, there’s been a number of areas that were mistranslated as well. It’s effectively a clean-up project to try to elevate the earlier English chapters to the quality that the later ones are, to give future and returning English readers as close to the experience that Baku and Itoh intended for Japanese readers as we can. As to the original volume 1, if you might have meant that, that was handled by like three or four different groups prior over a span of like seven years, and while “snappy” in English, wasn’t exactly accurate, at least to the tone of the Japanese script. Between that, and the previous scan quality for volume 1 being outright detrimental to the series, fixing the first five chapters up prior to releasing volume 15's chapters was a priority so that new readers who heard it was close to wrapping up could have a better time getting into it.
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>>105948
Did that analysis of various names and terms from CMX’s Volume 5 of Monster Collection to see if it meshed with what Itoh mentions his wife said about the translation being awful. Again, I don’t have free access to the other volumes, and have had to make do with this single one as an example, so perhaps it ought to be taken with a grain of salt. Text in brackets are my own thoughts on the “official” English names and words in front of them.

Names:
>カッシェ・アルバデル = Kasche Arbadel {Written in English on the art in chapter 1}
>コルボ = Cuervo {Corvo/Korvo; Italian to Spanish name for whatever reason; should also note that the character has a false eye, just like K in Kouya. His is explosive though.}
>シン・メーン・アルティエン = Shin Men Altien {More or less accurate to the Japanese kana, but missing the point of the character being Chinese inspired; Xin Mein Altien would be the proper spelling for that}
>ナスターシャ = Nastasha {Close enough}
>キキーモラ = Kikimora {Kikiimora}
>アンヘル = Anhel {Technically a correctly spoken name, but I suspect it should have been written Ángel, especially as he's a fallen angel}
>デルピエロ = Delpiero {May be Del Piero or DeRupiero?}
>ヴェバール = Vable {Does not match Futhark (Norse/Germanic) runes in the bubble, which are alphabetic and correspond to many modern western letters; Runes read “[unknown]ebarl”, possibly Webarl or Bebarl. Name seem to be a visual riff on the Ars Goetia demon ウェパル, Vepar or Vephar}
>聖リコル = Saint Ricol {Futhark on a statue in chapter 1 reads "San Rikol", or "Saint Rikol" in English, though modern K, Q, and hard C sounds all correspond to the same rune. "Ricol" isn't exactly wrong, but is open to debate}

>七人の戦鬼 = Seven Fighting Demons {Seven War Demons}
>鉄鎧鱗グンダり = Steel Scale Armor Gundar {“Iron Armor Scales Gundari”, name is perhaps a reference to 軍荼利明王, one of the Five Great Wisdom Kings}
>斬魔剣ラゴウ = Demon Sword Ragou {“Demon Slaying Sword Ragou”; Zanmaken is likely in part a reference to another Itoh work, Zanma Kenden, Ragou possibly refers to 羅候, Rahu of Hindu mythology, known as Ragou in Japanese}
>竜爪拳クりシュナ = Dragon Fist Krishuna (“Dragon Claw Fist Krishna”; Krishna is a major deity in Hinduism as the eighth avatar of Vishnu)
>金剛力カイマン = Strong Kaiman (“Vajra’s/Superhuman Strength Kaiman/Caiman”; most likely Caiman due to looking like a crocodilian; despite the small size of modern ones, they have some huge ancestors)
>転法輪チャクラム = Heavenly Ring Chakram (“Spinning Wheel of Dharma Chakram”)
>青龍偃月刀クバンダ = Blue Moon Dragon Spear Kubanda (“Blue Dragon Crescent Blade Kumbhanda?”; appears to refer to Guan Yu’s legendary Seiryu Engetsu weapon from The Romance of the Three Kingdoms; Kumbhanda is also some class of minor Buddhist deity)
>引導師ガルヴァ = Deadly Sutra Garva (“Master of Last Rites Galva”?; refers to one or both Buddhist “Indou” concepts, fitting a monk looking character, name possibly stemming from Buddhist “Musaragalva”?)

Attack Names:
>六道四生冥府魔道剣 = Demon Sword of Hades {Six Paths, Four Lives, Underworld Magic Sword? I figure there’s some eastern religious significance to the original name that’s been lost in English}
>青龍旋風昇天斬 = Blue Dragon Whirlwind Ascension Strike {Ascending Blue Dragon Whirlwind Slash?}
>砕岩断鉄破山撃 = Steel Rock Crusher Blast {Stone Crushing, Iron Mountain Slicing Attack?}
>ウオーターハンマー = Water Hammer {Accurate; furigana attached to 奔水鎚撃}
I sort of get the intent here to make the names shorter, sort of like how the Tales series localizes melee arte names from kanji strings to be quicker to say in English. But as a text-only work, I don’t feel like that excuses stuff like the first there. It’s not like they’re on a crunch for available audio time; text is read at the reader’s own speed, and fonts can be adjusted to fit better.
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>>106173
Terminology:
>ランドキーパー = “Landkeeper” {Accurate, kanji is 島守}
>悪天使 = “Evil Angel” {Accurate}
>ハイドラゴン = “High Dragon” {Accurate; kanji is 上位竜}
>ニーチエかサルトルかぁ = “G-man” {“Nietzsche ka, Sarte kaa~” Joke response to “・・・に・・・に・・・”(逃げゃあ)  doesn’t work with the English  “G… G…” (Get out of here!!) Can’t quite fault them here, but I’d think there had to be something better to replace it with.}
>クリムゾン・アント= “Crimson Ants” {Accurate}
>ガルガリンのゆびわ = Ring of Garugrin {Doraemon parody? Raw responds with "なんのモノマネなんだよ!!?", but I can’t find a connection for the “ガルガリン” to Doraemon like CMX implied. Sort of looks like the Ultra Ring visually, though, so maybe it’s just a visual shout out}
>エルド神官 = Eldo Grand Church {Eldo/Eld Priest; I guess the context it’s used in is roughly the same, at least, as it’s like “don’t let the priests/church hear that”}
>サザン = Sazan {This is fine; research into MonColle's PS1 game and TTRPG shows no intent toward “Southern” as the town’s name, as it's located centrally}
>アンシクぺディア・ヴエルム = Encyclopedia Verum {Fine, unless it's a another visual riff to something I don't recognize. Kanji is 真宰辞書}
ウイング = “Air Force” (ウイング is attached as furigana to 空軍, so accurate, albeit to the kanji instead; maybe there’s a card named “Wing” in the TCG being referenced?)
>カース・エレメンタル = “Curse Elemental” {Accurate; kanji is 呪いの魔精霊}
>ヴジャド = “Vujyad” {Maybe? The Japanese name is actually a visual riff on how the word ウジャト, “Ujat”, looks, which is another pronunciation of what is more often said as “Wedjat” in English. Visually, the ヴジャド uses an emblem very close in appearance to the Eye of Ra, or “Right Wedjat Eye”, so I’d think the best way for this be handled in English would be to invoke the “Wedjat” feel a bit more, like “Vudjad”}

Overall, not as horrid as I was expecting (and credit where it’s due, CMX’s left in the Futhark runes, so there’s really no good excuse for Anime waves replacing them with Latin), but clearly missing some of the intended references, and I can see how Itoh would have complaints about the eastern religious and cultural elements being glossed over, even if perhaps done more for the sake of space/wordiness than just being tossed out because the translator didn’t like them (though that seemed to be the point of the 七人の戦鬼; they’re clearly prideful loudmouths, but very much have the strength to back up their titles, so not mere lackeys for Xin). Still much better ways to handle that though, even if it took a notes page, or perhaps leaving the Japanese name as the title, with a definition above it in small text akin to furigana.

Those are just the instances I felt had to be double checked. Seems more competent than Anime Wave’s work, but from what I saw of their volume 1, that’s not a high bar. I don’t know exactly to what degree Itoh was talking about “polytheistic worldview” and “Christian interpretation” in the raw for the Makura omake in volume 6 of Kouya here, whether that was the best English translation for what he was discussing. I didn’t see too much at all that directly fit the bill with CMX’s MonColle Vol 5, but worse could have been elsewhere in the volumes we don’t have access to. What I do feel is that, given his liking for incorporating Hindu and Buddhist elements in his work, if I were him and went to the effort to make references to that with character names and such, and the people working on bringing it to another language didn’t bother to keep it intact for readers, or maybe even notice it to begin with, I’d be a bit annoyed to find that out too. 

That’s just my take away from it. Suppose I might as well try to get through Anime Wave's stuff, just in case that one really does wholesale replace the eastern polytheistic elements harder.
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Apologies again for the delay. Was looking into that issue the old notes page for the chapter brings up regarding the at-the-time current change to the Dokkaku Soldier names. Obviously that’s not necessary here compared to just the “how do you get Mako-chan from Makura” question, but I do think that going back and adding to/revising the notes for Chapter 2 might be wise. The more I’ve delved into it, not only has it felt like there’s been a lot more unspoken meaning to Mikado and Maya’s discussion as to where the names come from, which those familiar with Buddhism would more readily see significance in, but also just how much the names of the Divine Generals vary, not just from culture to culture, but even locally in Japan, where there are not only the hard-designated, original-to-Japanese names, but also differing sets of animals assigned to specific names, as well as multiple names for each general that are accepted as the “original” Sanskrit. The potential story being the latter of which being what I’ve mostly been digging around for. 

And it’s weird, really. I've spent a long time now sifting around online, yet I haven’t been able to find anything concrete on that discrepancy either (granted, I do have some theories that feel pretty likely, but in the end, they’re just speculative), so I’m guessing any easy answer has been lost to time as even the Japanese don’t seem to know, but have been able to verify that the list of names on English wikipedia do correspond to at least one digital-transcription of The Medicine Buddha Sutra in Devanagari Sanskrit. As to the Japanese ones, most of the names used in Kouya are still based on actual Sanskrit words, with some English translations of the sutra using most of if not the very same names. They also more-or-less sync up with the names used for the Shinshou in Shin Megami Tensei II (the Japanese artbook has them Romanized as such, anyhow; English patch did things a bit differently) and the Devas in Digimon Tamers.
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>>106417
And interestingly enough, it would appear that at least some of the Dokkaku Soldiers, either in terms of personality or the events around them, do wind up either embodying the meaning of said words in Sanskrit, or ironically being the opposite. “Andira” (said “Ahn-deer” or “An-deer” in Nepali and Hindi Sanskrit respectively) refers to “manly” or “strong”, which syncs with him trying to pass himself off as the strongest Dokkaku soldier (while individually being pretty weak physically, and probably the second least mature given his screeching about chopsticks). Another concrete-feeling example would be. Sindura also being called Kinnara/Kimnara (“Keen-nahr”) at times, the latter refers to a mythological Hindu creature associated with music and often depicted with wings; Sindura in Kouya seems to enjoy at least humming that Return of Ultraman track to himself while he works. Catura (“Cah-toor”) means something like “clever” or “cautious”, traits he most certainly lacks. Majira somehow being derived from Anira (“Ah-neer”) has a meaning of “wind” and is associated with Vayu, a Hindu wind god; Majira eventually eventually grows wings after molting off Gen’s car bomb damage. Kumbhira does refer to a deified crocodile, but a close word with one additional Sanskrit character, Kumbhiraka, means “thief”, which is pretty fitting for his role in the backstory. There are others that feel are more iffy in their connection but still potentially relevant, so I think it’s something worth exploring.

Additionally, I’ve found that Yakushi Nyorai is attended to by two retainers, Nikkou Bosatsu (日光菩薩) and Gekkou Bosatsu (月光菩薩), the bodhisattva of sunlight and moonlight respectively. Among the kanji used in these figure’s names, Houzan’s two main underlings, Kusakabe (日下部) and Tsukigata (月形) bear the “sun”/”day” and “moon” kanji. With Yakushimaru Houzan being analogous to Yakushi Nyorai in this story, being the one who the Dokkaku Soldiers serve, this would suggest that Kusakabe and Tsukigata are his retainers. His leaving them in charge whenhe’s not present is similar to how the two aforementioned bodhisattva are Yakushi’s immediate successors to his state of Buddhahood, as well as how Nikkou and Gekkou are both above the Twelve Divine Generals as far as hierarchy goes. In Japan, these three Buddhist figures are collectively called “The Yakushi Triad” (薬師三尊; Yakushi sanzen). I think that’s worth a note when the opportunity presents itself, especially how that’s a connection that’s not so clear in English as opposed to being able to see the kanji.

Anyhow, onto the notes pages. As usual, please read these over and let me know if anything is wrong or is missing.
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>>106418
>>105957
I found there was quite a bit to be said regarding Kansai accents and their use in media. Bit of a long note, but I think it’ll still be of interest to readers. I’d also like to include some raw crops as images, just so readers can readily identify written tells for such.

Using an image from Chapter 3’s raw to showcase that the Sanskrit names were indeed intended for use in English over the Japanese ones. Also, while not meant as an insult Itoh, I did find the Engrish on the page to be amusing back then, and helps to justify the edits to be grammatically sound in our English version. To double check something, as it’s in the notes here, is “Yonhi” really the right Romanization for 英姫, or did Itoh or Baku make a mistake back in chapter 2? Just asking since, in going to Chapter 3 to make sure I got the right name for the one speaking here, the raw has 英姫 in the section in parentheses, and looking it up on tangorin, the closest name seems to be “Yunhi”, at least for Japanese. Or is she perhaps from elsewhere in Asia where Yonhi is indeed a name? Gen seems fond of variety.

I managed to track down the earliest mentions of “Shirai Kyofu” to the “Shin Majuugari” subseries of Psycho Divers, which debuted in the 90s. I might ask what exactly the best way to approximate an English term from “魔獣”would be (no English summaries, but I did notice the Japanese audible site has back-of-book information). While the first three Majuugari books from the 80s are now digitally available in English, the publisher dropped the “Majuugari” name from the titles altogether in favor of just using “Psyche Divers” as the series label with custom titles, so that really doesn’t help resolve it at all.
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>>106419
While on the topic, I can also essentially confirm now for >>105583 that, while again, descriptions have nothing about a sex cult, the Japanese description for Majuugari Inraku-hen does mention starting with one of the protagonists witnessing a sacrificial ritual of a woman in Tanzawa, while the English Amazon description (“Psyche Divers: Desires of the Flesh”), talks about a dangerous religion whose leaders seek immortality via ancient barbaric rituals. Also a suggestion that one of the three protagonists winds up losing half his hand in a fight with a monster, which might well tie in with Mikado’s losing two of his fingers later.

It seems like Kusa Dango are indeed often served at tea ceremonies, so I suppose the Japanese don’t find it as redundant that what they’re eating tastes like what they’re drinking. Decided to give that being a possibility a mention.

A description of cherubs mentions that the term may be derived from one of various similar Assyrian words; do you guys think it would be more interesting to include as the second image the art by Raphael on the page currently, or this Assyrian cylinder seal (these were rolled over wet clay, which was then fired to create a designation of property) impression depicting a possible inspiration for a (non-tetramorph) cherub?

Found that the original Kouya novels were given another print in the 2000s, that time with what looks to have been Amano as the cover artist (he seems to work with Baku a lot). So we should be able to include these at the end of volume 15 again, along with the originals. Unfortunately I haven’t been able to find ones as large as the former.
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>>106419
Felt something was a bit off on the last one before posting it. Fixed the body text height to be properly centered.
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>>106118
Almost forgot, to elaborate more on the research mentioned at the start of this here, I’d thought I might try to find what the sources of the imagery in the background for the map of Mexico, Guatemala, and Honduras in chapter 66. The manga doesn't specify about them, but I figured they couldn't all be Mayan from the page context. From top left to bottom right on there:
>An Atlantean Figure (from Tula, Toltec civilization; a set of these are also seen in Chapter 22)
>An “elongated man” figure (From La Venta, Olmec civilization)
>A werejaguar-styled “Kunz Axe” (from Veracruz area, Olmec civilization)
>Colossal Head 1 (From San Lorenzo, Olmec civilization)
>The carved lid of Pakal the Great’s sarcophagus (from Palenque, Maya civilization)
>A “Sun Stone” calendar (from Tenochtitlan, Aztec/Mexica civilization)
>A funerary urn in the form of a deity effigy (Monte Alban, Zapotec civilization; this urn is currently on display at the Gardiner Textile Musuem in Canada)
>A jade death mask with “divine breath” (Calakmul Structure VII, Maya civilization)
>A sculpture of a Witz monster/god building decoration (Temple 22, Copan)
The urn and Witz were particularly hard to find; the latter much more-so than the former, because what does one even search for going off the manga art? Read some stuff about that temple in Copan as well representing the sacred mountain the gods first discovered maize at, which makes it come off like a mandala in its own right, like the pyramid in the manga. I’m still not certain as to which elongated man figure the second is supposed to though. They seem to have been ritually buried as sets by the Olmecs, so a lot of photos I've seen just have them as group dioramas not all facing the same direction. Easy to potentially pass over the one it was based on if it's not facing the right way.

I’ve also found that most of the Mayan sites on the map have had what seem to be their original names uncovered (the ones using modern Maya names or Spanish, I mean), which would make for an interesting note (or to put below the site names in parentheses), except for El Mirador. 
>Bonampak: Known as Ak’e broadly, and Usiij Witz (Vulture Hill) locally.
>Calakmul: In ancient times, this site was referred to as Ox Te' Tuun (Three Stones), but also, perhaps in the sense of the broad city-state, as Chiik Naab'.
>Copan: The original name of this city has been determined as Oxwitik (Three Witik; the meaning of “Witik” is not clear as of now).
>Palenque: In Yucatec, it’s name is Bàakʼ, while to the Itza Maya, it was Lakamhaʼ (Big Waters)
>Tikal: This was either Mutal or Yax Mutal (First Mutal, perhaps implying this was the first city bearing the Mutal name)
>Yaxchilan: Its emblem glyph reads Pa’ Chan (Cleft Sky).
Uxmal, Mayapan, and Chichen Itza are already Mayan, though their spellings might differ from the original words (Uxmal might properly be "Óoxmáal", and derived from Oxmal, "Three Times Built", or Uchmal, "What is to come; the future").

In contrast, all I can find for El Mirador is that it might have been “Kan”, or “Kaan”, or “K’aan”, but with that just meaning of “Snake”, it doesn’t really fit the naming conventions of the other ones, which if translated from Mayan actually come off like location names (“Vulture Hill”, “Cleft Sky”, “Three Stones”, etc). Granted, there does seem to have been a “Snake Kingdom” or “Snake Dynasty”, which is more sensible, but that might be something that applies more to the Mirador Basin as a whole than the El Mirador site. Especially since the same “Sacred Lord of the Snake” title shows up on king lists at Calakmul as well. Speaking of which, I've got Calakmul spelled with a "k" now, so that'll be properly corrected when that chapter is being output again.
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On the idea of providing more of an explanation on some of the Buddhist elements earlier on, I figured I’d start with expanding the “Devas, Legions, and Generals” note in chapter 2, even if the former two aren’t playing much of a role compared to the latter. Now it defines each group’s role, as well as why Mikado would be guessing as to the first two being the sources of their codenames. From what I can see, it’s much more of an educated guess than it might otherwise come off as: one of the Four Devas, known in Sanskrit as Vaisravana and in Japanese as Bishamonten, was founded upon a Hindu god named Kubera, and among the Eight Legions, the Yaksha legion is sometimes associated with the name Kubanda in Japanese (Skt: “Kumbhanda”), both of which sound reasonable close to both Kubira and Kumbhira in a tired, confused mind.

I did have to push the notes afterward to another page, but that’s worked out fine as there’s material I can use regarding the school bus note and Buddha’s quote that can serve as images (latter one has an associated pose that’s actually used in a lot of “Buddha at Birth” statues and figurines). Incidentally though, I want to ask: how exactly did the line “幼稚園のバスでも襲うのか!!” become “Do they need to hijack a preschool bus!?” in the English pages for Chapter 2? Only reason I noticed was in watching a bit of episode 20 of Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger for a clean screenshot after reading an episode summary that involved the topic of buses. While I guess Grifforzar turning giant and walking off carrying a school bus (belonging to a kindergarten, as the subtitles translate) could be “hijacking” it, it still comes off more like a general attack on it and the passengers, especially once the smaller monsters try to push it off a cliff he apparently set it down near.

On the idea of providing more of an explanation on some of the Buddhist elements earlier on, I figured I’d start with expanding the “Devas, Legions, and Generals” note in chapter 2, even if the former two aren’t playing much of a role compared to the latter. Now it defines each group’s role, as well as why Mikado would be guessing as to the first two being the sources of their codenames. From what I can see, it’s much more of an educated guess than it might otherwise come off as: one of the Four Devas, known in Sanskrit as Vaisravana and in Japanese as Bishamonten, was founded upon a Hindu god named Kubera, and among the Eight Legions, the Yaksha legion is sometimes associated with the name Kubanda in Japanese (Skt: “Kumbhanda”), both of which sound reasonable close to both Kubira and Kumbhira in a tired, confused mind.

I did have to push the notes afterward to another page, but that’s worked out fine as there’s material I can use regarding the school bus note and Buddha’s quote that can serve as images (latter one has an associated pose that’s actually used in a lot of “Buddha at Birth” statues and figurines). Also expanded a few of the other notes with more information, such as the Three Arms Exports Ban (which actually regards three types of countries banned from selling to, not three weapon types as I’d thought), as well as more on Sowaka and the Sanskrit term it stems from, Svaha.

Incidentally though, I want to ask: how exactly did the line “幼稚園のバスでも襲うのか!!” become “Do they need to hijack a preschool bus!?” in the English pages for Chapter 2? Only reason I noticed was in watching a bit of episode 20 of Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger for a clean screenshot after reading an episode summary that involved the topic of buses. While I guess Grifforzar turning giant and walking off carrying a school bus (belonging to a kindergarten, as the subtitles translate) could be “hijacking” it, it still comes off more like a general attack on it and the passengers, especially once the smaller monsters try to push it off a cliff he apparently set it down near.
Replies: >>106535 >>106543
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>>106534
Text positioning fixed.
>>106534
Still working on the notes for 16, but just wanted to explain 幼稚園のバスでも襲うのか!! . As the notes indicate, it was a common terror act in sentai shows to the point of cliche. The episode you mention is likely a semi-parody of that, since the enemy just steals the entire bus instead. If you want to generalize it to "attack a preschool bus" or change it to "steal a preschool bus", you can, but that really takes the context out of it.
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>>106543
Good to see you again. Hope you're doing better.

>If you want to generalize it to "attack a preschool bus" or change it to "steal a preschool bus", you can, but that really takes the context out of it.
It's fine, I was just curious about it.
>>105950
098: I agree with the motion being a setup for the attack on the next page, although I suspect the reader is supposed to be uncertain until it's confirmed as a strike.

100: I'd say ヒュウ is an exhalation from Makura while the ゴッ is the "sound" of her attack. Much like how ゴゴゴ has a heavy, looming feel, ゴッ has a sudden but weighty effect to it. In other words, it's not purely a sound effect like rushing air; it also captures the feeling of the situation too. Anyway, I'd just go with "wham", which I think we've used for ゴッ before, despite the attack not actually landing until panel 3.
"Whap-whop" works for me, it got me thinking of that standard kung-fu-movie noise they use for blocking strikes.

101: Looking at it, it's gotta be the mask ripping.

103: It gets the spirit of the yell across, since he's clearly saying it with that in mind. If we want to be more strict, we could just go with a generic insult like "You bastard!" or "Asshole!" (okay, not that one, given the incoming strike from behind), but I'd prefer leaving it as-is.

104: The タン sounds come from both of them pushing off trees. Mikado may have purposefully pushed towards the ground to set up his upwards double-kick. For a translation, the generic "bam" works.

105: The changes look good, it gets the sudden surprise in without losing any of the original meaning. I think ゴ is actually for panel 3, much like Makura's ゴ attack on 100, with the トン being the sound of her landing on Mikado's feet.

106: Perhaps
>Lighter than I expected.
or
>Lighter than I would've guessed.
would feel more natural, either way.

107: Like you said, スゥ is a focus on the arms, like strength and attention "flowing" to them. For the words, perhaps
-2-
>I'm going to grab this guy...

-3-
>then get out of here!!
would work better.

108: Makura's line in the last panel doesn't actually mention her "lethal weapons" as a reason for recognizing her as a Dokkaku soldier; I suspect she's staying true to her Kansai spirit by doing a late double-take on Mikado calling her one two panels ago.
<Are they how you knew I was a Dokkaku soldier!?
>How'd you know I was a Dokkaku soldier!?

110: I think it's the Kansai version of これからよろしく, so "Nice to meet you" fits as a standard translation; I don't know if Mikado personally met any of the Dokkaku soldiers before his own infection (naturally, he wouldn't remember them afterwards).

continued
Replies: >>106577 >>106809
>>106576
111: 我々 means he is speaking on behalf of a larger organization, not just the two people here; it must refer to the anti-Thalamus group.

114: The first panel makes it clear that there are standing orders for Gen not to come to HQ. Gen's response is a counter to those standing orders; he's arguing that there's no need to follow those orders because his bastard birth wouldn't make the news. To break down the sentence:
>土方グループ総帥に妾腹の隠し子がいた
<The Hijikata Group head has a hidden child by a mistress;
>くらいで
<that sort of thing [dismissive]
>話題になるほど
<(being) enough to cause a problem,
>今の世相は
<the current state of society is
>ニュース不足じゃありませんよ
<not one that is lacking news.

I think the original translation gets this across, but if you feel it's got problems, perhaps
>"The head of the Hijikata Group has an illegitimate child" isn't a hot topic
>when the world still has plenty of other news.
Any other adjustments along those lines would work too.
As for 儂, it's just a way old people say "I" that can't really be reflected in English speech patterns. I don't believe it's region-specific, so it just reflects on his age.

115: "Yakushimaru Houzan has turned traitor on us." is fine if you feel the panel doesn't read well; I think it's alright, even if it's a bit squished. The lower ring tone SFX in 3 and 4 is probably more like a low office ring tone than the usual "ringy" type. Something like this:
https://youtu.be/7vq2R5z-O14

116: Panel 4 is Gen being extra-lax, probably to annoy Makoto more. He does say that they're too hard to handle, implying that he can't; of course, we know he believes he can handle them just fine, he's just playing things up here. Panel 5's bubbles can be better translated as
>I'd like to remind you that
>I was opposed to the Dokkaku soldier development project from the very beginning.

117: Regarding collars and leashes: I think the idea of a collared dog being an owned  one (and thus a controlled one) is the same in the West as it is in Japan. The line should read:
>That's because
>wolves hate collars.

119: I agree with the changes, just a few typos:
-2-
>It'll be when Pajra and Indra come back to Japan.

-3-
>Cherubim won't make a move towards the two of them.

For panel 4's last bubble, "we" implies it's the Hijikata Group doing it, but doesn't really go into details as to who. It does give a bit more info about how, though, so it can be changed to:
-4-
>We've just begun transporting their corpses to the lab.

120: The last panel's second sound effect comes off more as the beginning of a fall (as if, for a split second, he's floating) than as a sigh. Of course, that isn't actually a sound effect at all, similar to し〜ん for silence. Perhaps "fwip..." or "whoosh...", or something like that.

122: I agree with the changes, nice work.

I'll admit here and now that my slow speed isn't going to improve for the next few months, since life is being a real bitch right now. Since we aren't directly publishing these updates, it may make sense to move on to future chapters without my input and let me play catch-up instead of waiting for me every time. Whatever works better for you, I'm just spitballing here.
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>>106576
>>106577
Thanks again for getting back to me with that. Would have responded sooner, but had a family emergency to deal with for the past week.

>I'd say ヒュウ is an exhalation from Makura while the ゴッ is the "sound" of her attack.
Hmm, looking there again, I can see that now. Makes me sort of envision it as akin to that  “deep exhale” from Hamon users in Jojo’s. Not that it’s meant as a reference, clearly, but I’ve tried to see if I could adapt something similar here for Makura’s build without it being confusable with the usual *Hyuu!* sound effect. Also noticed the sound effect in the second panel is actually ビュッ, so I’ve opted to make that “Woosh!”

>For a translation, the generic "bam" works. 
“Bam” to me feels more like impact than pushing away, especially since it already follows a panel of each getting into position against their respective trees.

>Any other adjustments along those lines would work too. 
Alright. Blending the original for the first bubble with with the second line you suggested comes off pretty naturally if you ask me.

>"Yakushimaru Houzan has turned traitor on us." is fine if you feel the panel doesn't read well; I think it's alright, even if it's a bit squished. 
Testing it again with the original line, I suppose it doesn’t actually look that bad if we do split “Yakushimaru” into two lines but leave the wording as it is. 80% width still helps preserve the weight better.

>I agree with the changes, just a few typos: 
While I’m thinking about it and fixing the typos, I’m a bit curious: Is referring to people with the term “karada” (体) normal in Japanese when counting them, or is stuff like 九体 or 六体 implying a certain level of dehumanization of the subject? Just wondering as a description I saw online says it works for counting humanoid forms, but the examples given aren’t for actually living people. Mikado and Kawabata also both use “人” instead next chapter, when Mikado gives his estimates of both the amount of Dokkaku soldiers involved in the massacre as well as the victims. If 体 is meant to be distain for the soldiers from the Hijikatas, I’m not sure if there’s a way to outright incorporate that into the script without it feeling unnatural, but I could always add a note reflecting its usage.

Also, the math on the page felt a bit weird to me reading it over again, and I think I found the issue. The English script has Cherubim mentioned as having nine D-1 types at their disposal, which would be all the remaining soldiers minus Mikado as the D-2. That would imply that, along with Pajra and Indra, Makura could most likely be counted on joining back up with Houzan, despite seeming to be happily employed by Kawabata (who the Hijikatas financially back) and the animosity the other Dokkaku soldiers feel toward her. The raw for that line is simply “D-1型は現在九体だったな・・” with no implication of loyalties, so I’m inclined to rephrase it in English to “There were nine D-1 types left, correct?” That would remove the chance of reader confusion, as well as making it properly ambiguous as to which side Pajra and Indra are apt to take in having been away from the country so far, that the Hijikatas may not be completely shit out of luck.
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>>106809
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>>106810
>I'll admit here and now that my slow speed isn't going to improve for the next few months, since life is being a real bitch right now. 
That works fine for me. Take your time, and just let us know when things are more feasible to continue with on your end. In the meantime, I can work ahead with our stitcher on what visual edits feel necessary for stitches and sound effects, continue to do further research, and write up logs to have ready for the future.

One more thing though: This seems to be the point in the old version of the early series where honorifics in regard Mikado began to be ignored, with Kawabata calling him 御門君 in the raw but just “Mikado” in English. I don’t mind editing things going forward to include them (verifying usage or not via the raws), so just let me know when you get a chance what you want to do from here on this round regarding it.
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>>105608
>>105609
Work for Chapter 17:
No spreads to stitches, again. p_126 could use the sound effect in the first panel cleared. p_134 could use the sound effect in in panel 3 cleared. p_144 could use the sound effect in panel 1 cleared if possible, but I’ll understand if the pattern makes it too complex. Sound effects in panels 1 and 6 on p_151 and panels 1 and 2 on p_152 should be cleared. Let me know if any overlays of the English text are needed.
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Also, something to be considered for next chapter: we need to figure out how to make the background bubbles in this panel into something that actually sounds both grammatically correct, as well accurate to biology or health or whatnot. I know that the point of the panel is that all of this jargon goes clean over Makura’s head, and most likely the reader’s as well, but knowing Itoh and Baku, I wager there’s actual science being discussed here, so given the snippets of the conversation are here, we need to approximate something that sounds credibly accurate to science in English.

That said, I've been trying for hours to try to figure out any real sort of connection to the main subjects of retroviruses and junk DNA and the topics in the bubbles, but haven’t managed anything concrete. I don’t know if the two bubbles are even on the same topic, as in a continuation, or if they’re two separate examples. I don’t think this is so much a translation-related question at this point (aside from syntax of what is affecting what), but more of a research one of finding something that fits, so it strikes me that anyone could help out here if they want. No rush on trying to find answers, as I can always edit them in later. I’ll provide the keywords that are visible here for ease of copy and pasting.
>メラノサイトで{or と?}カロテノイド色素{obscured}共存効果
<Carotenoid pigments (with/in/within/and?) melanocytes […] coexistence effect 
>{obscured}微細構造{obscured}による干渉{obscured}ジエチルスチ*{obscured}
<[…] ultrastructural […] (viral? RNA? crossover?) interference due to […] diethylsty(rene)* […]
*Could also possibly be diethylstilbestrol (ジエチルスチルベストロール)
Replies: >>106835 >>110372
>>106834
Also, to clarify, the "(viral? RNA? crossover?)" isn't in the Japanese text there, but there are many different types of things in science apparently labelled as "interference". Those particular ones listed seem like the forms of interference most likely to have something to do with what's being discussed there.
Quick check-up: how many of you guys are survive? How many are kill?
Replies: >>107653 >>107714
>>107651
Typesetter here. Still around, waiting for chapter 17's visual edits to come in. Been working on more notes research in the meantime (as well as fonting and framing for another potential future project). Might as well post some of them now:

>"A meditation orb?"
The raw mentions this as a baoding ball, a type of metal ball developed in China during the Ming Dynasty (mid 1300s to mid 1600s), and also known as Chinese exercise balls, health balls, meditation balls, or medicine balls. They’re apparently used for physical exercise and therapy, where two or more balls are rotated at once within the hand. Similar to western stress balls, but with a solid outside and hollow inside, in which a small marble and chime reside to generate noise. I have to wonder if there might be some specific reason Sandira seems to use them as a projectile weapon beyond just being big enough to do a lot of damage. Anyhow, I'm thinking if there's a potential connection between them and Buddhism, it might be worth keeping the raw name intact. 

>Cannibalism in New Guinea
I've heard theories that, while it does indeed hold ritual significance in modern times as opposed to a liking for the taste or consumption for nutritional value, New Guinea, New Zealand, and the people of the "Cannibal Islands" such as Fiji may have indeed started it as an answer to malnutrition in the way of possible protein starvation, given that islands have limited resources (though New Guinea itself is still quite big for an island). This also seems like a worthwhile place to mention that there are two times of cannibalism; endo-cannibalism, which is eating from within a group, and exo-cannibalism, which is eating those outside of such, and being that the ritual and symbolic reasoning behind both are quite different, if you do one, you don't do the other. Cultures like those of the Chipuka would be endo-cannibals, eating their own deceased in a respectful manner, while other groups, like the tribe the apparently infamous "cannibal chief" Udre-Udre of Fiji was part of, are exo-cannibals, where enemies killed in war were eaten, either as a way to humiliate and dehumanize them, or to add their strength to the victor's own. 

Cases of situational cannibalism don't fall into either, as those don't have an in-group/out-group preference or ritual aspect, and are simply eat or die.

>"Two-legged sheep"
China has a long history of cannibalism, though that's in part due to having a long written history and civilization in general, and the "Official Dynastic Histories" report some roughly three hundred episodes of such during the span it covers. The term though seems to stem from a diarist in the 1300s, whose writings were translated and quoted in English by Dieter Kuhn in his 2009 book, "The Age of Confucian Rule". The way he terms it, the diarist reports that it was considered "flesh of thought" and "two-legged mutton" (maybe that would be a better term to use in the chapter script, to make clear the intent as food?). That said, his book is from 2009, well after this chapter would have released, but maybe the phrase has been known around Japan for longer than in English?

Of course, it’s not uncommon for historical accounts to demonize one’s opponents by portraying them as acting less than human, be it between different countries or different eras of the same one, so it may be worth taking with a grain of salt, and famine-induced cannibalism (such as the Donner Party) is often not as frowned on as other reasons for it.
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>>107653
>Pterosaurs the size of Cessnas
Itoh's remark in the omake is referring to the Cretaceous Azdarchids, the largest of the pterosaurs. This group includes the famous Quetzalcoatlus and its namesake, Azdarcho, but also the less commonly known Cryodraken and Hatzegopteryx, among others. While undoubtedly some of if not the largest animals to have ever achieved self powered flight, it's thought they more likely preferred walking on the ground on their hands and feet with their heads high above the ground, picking off smaller prey like some kind of terrifying, giraffe-sized marabou stork. Hatzegopteryx especially, being a large animal that could readily come and go from what has been called Hatzeg Island, the fossils of landbound dinosaurs there having been tiny variants due to insular dwarfism that would have made them much easier prey than relatives elsewhere.

>Acala
Given a brief mention in the previous chapter, Acala, known to the Japanese as Fudo Myoo, is the Buddhist King of Light. He fights against greed, anger, and ignorance, and his protection is often invoked at the outbreak of battle or during efforts to deal with natural disasters. Visually, he is often depicted as an old man surrounded by flames, with a sword in one hand and lasso to ensnare demons with in the other. He has a similar braid as Houzan does here, but I've so far not seen has it depicted anywhere near that long.

On the topic of Houzan's omake, I might also ask here, does it at all feel like his family name might have been based on not just Yakushi Nyorai, but actress and singer Yakushimaru Hiroko? Her name is one of the only ones that comes up when searching for "Yakushimaru" or "薬師丸".

>Rani
This should actually be corrected to "Lani", which is the most common Papua language on the Indonesian side of Papua New Guinea. The tribe the name is derived from is also "Lani" (sometimes called "Western Dani"), who live within Highland Papua.

>Van der Waal’s Force:
Beyond what was found on this prior (or in the manga's future, that is), some biologists have also come to think Van Der Waal’s Force may be a derived application of what is called “Nullpunktsenergie”, or Zero-Point Energy (IE: the quantum energy within a vacuum). This idea is based on the idea that, the way a gecko’s footpads are made, it can expand and contract the shape of the vacuums between its feet and surface. Under pressure, the void space exhibits a measurable level of “Casimir’s Force”, attempting to lose excess energy stemming from the virtual particles within it by pulling the bounds of the vacuum closer, creating a suction effect. We don't need to go much further than this, as it is a very complex topic, but we can include a mention of a good "layman" explanation regarding it at the end of the note (History of the Universe episode “Why Shouldn’t the Universe Exist?”).
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>>107654
Regarding Houzan’s past:
>Tenshou:
There are two periods of Japanese history phonetically named as “Tenshou”, though their written kanji differ. The one used here (天正) refers to the Yakushimaru style being founded somewhere between 1573 and 1592. Also known as the Momoyama Period.

Incidentally, I notice that here, Anzui claims the founder was Yakushimaru Higo-no-Kami Mototaka (薬師丸肥後守玄位), but Houzan’s own family tree at the start of chapter 60 suggests it was Yakushimaru Tetsuzan (薬師丸鉄山). So just to double check, are these two meant to be the same person, but perhaps with a name change (Anzui seeming to be focused on upholding tradition and all), or two completely different roles, or Mototaka not being directly in the lineage leading to Houzan, isn’t shown? Wanting to make sure we’re not missing something here. A “higo-no-kami” (or higonokami; how do we want to write this out?) is also a type of folding knife with a metal handle, but the kanji also mean “Governor of Higo” (an old province in Kyushu). I’m guessing the latter is the intent of the name, as the knife apparently only debuted in the late 1800s (after the samurai class was dissolved, resulting in steel being used for knives and tools rather than swords), but I’m not sure why it’s being invoked. Were prestigious social positions treated like middle names back then? I mean, would the name be thought of as something like "Governor Mototaka Yakushimaru" if put into standard English?

>Meiji, Taisho, Showa:
The previous English line these are mentioned in, "Meiji, Taisho, Showa; the eras have come and gone." conflicts with the list of historical events in Houzan's life in chapter 28, where it says that he killed his father Ansui in self-defense at some point in the 1970s. The Showa era would only be "gone" come early 1989. Looking at the raw line regarding these (明治大正昭和と時代が変わろうが), it seems to come out more to "Although times have changed from (with?) the Meiji, Taisho, and Showa eras", which would make more sense with the chronology in chapter 28. The subsequent lines might also need some revising in line of that. In any case, the periods being spoken of range from late 1868 to early 1989, with the Meiji Restoration's ending the samurai class likely being a key event for the family when it comes to such "changing times".

>Statuary:
As seen in the cave spread, eight of the Twelve Divine Generals surround the seated figure of a Yakushi Nyorai (Bhaisajyaguru in the original Sanskrit), the Buddha of medicine. Undoubtedly, the remaining four are also present, perhaps behind the reader’s viewpoint. While typically depicted seated, clutching a jar of medicinal nectar in his left hand, with his right upon his knee and holding a stem of a fruit, he is occasionally seen as he is here. In Buddhist iconography, an outstretched hand, palm facing out with the fingers pointing upward, is the Abhaya Buddha Mudra (a ritual gesture) representing fearlessness and protection, and symbolically, an interpretation of preaching.
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>>107655
Regarding Itoh’s meeting with Nabe-chan:

>“Mitsumushi”:
The panel with Itoh calling Nabe-chan this is a reference to Onmyoji (also spelled “Onmyouji”), a novel series by Yumemakura Baku, and it’s two film adaptations. Itoh is shown here dressed as Onmyoji’s main character, Abe-no-Seimei (a famous onmyoji, or practitioner of yin-yang magic, called onmyodo), with Nabe dressed as his shikigami Mitsumushi. Mitsumushi’s name literally means “honeybug”, which obviously has a certain feel to it.

And since I think that raises a question of it’s own:
>Shikigami:
A being conjured by an onmyoji, a master and practitioner of onmyodo, to aid them in their duties. A Shikigami’s power is connected to that of their summoner; if said onymoji is experienced at their craft, their shikigami can inhabit and even manipulate the bodies of animals or people, but if their master is careless, their shikigami can gain their own will, and may kill them. Shikigami are typically called forth for jobs deemed too risky by their onmyoji masters. They serve as spies, thieves, and trackers.

>Yoshiki-sensei:
Nabe seems to be referring to Tanaka Yoshiki (田中芳樹, referred to in the raw as “T中Y樹”), a Japanese novelist known for the likes of “The Heroic Legend of Arslan” and “Legend of the Galactic Heroes”. One of his other series, “Tenjiku Neppuuroku” (Eng: “Chronicle of the Searing Winds of Tianzhu”), would go on to be adapted into a manga by Itoh Sei post-Kouya.
>>107651
Translator here. To follow up on what I wrote earlier, real life is not letting up and my energy and ability to work on this project is at an all-time low. I will do what I can to clean up translations of the updated chapters as they come up, but all the cool extra material tirelessly dug up by the typesetter is regrettably beyond me right now. Hopefully a girl falls from the sky and leads me on a four-cour hero's journey that ends with killing a demon god or something. Anyway, I'll keep at it.
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>>107655
To add onto this, the volcano shown on p_071 in Chapter 21 looks to resemble that of Kyushu's Sakurajima, which usually erupts out of a vent in the southern peak, Mount Minami. This would explain the eruption column not being centered with the central peak. It did have a couple of major (comparatively; they were both only VEI 3s) eruptions in the 70s; twice in 1974, to be exact. That said, I'm not sure trying to afix a direct year to the events in the flashback it is the intent here. Sakurajima is one of the most active volcanoes on Earth, to the point I've seen it averaged as having something like a thousand very minor eruptions a year. So I wouldn't be surprised if it's smoking to some degree most days anyhow.

In any case, if it is intended to suggest at least a location, it makes me wonder if there's some sort of cliffside/cavernous Buddhist temple or shrine either on the "island" (it finally connected to the mainland in a 1914 eruption, but the name Sakurajima has continued to be used) or in the vicinity of the bay surrounding it that this Yakushimaru one is based off of.

>>107714
Appreciate you checking in. That sucks, but life does indeed happen. No need to rush through stuff. Do what you can, when you can, and we’ll keep the thread going in the meantime. If it helps and isn’t something you’ve already considered, I’ve taken to typing up posts for this in text documents. Helps with keeping progress on logs, research posts, replies, and such going, rather than feeling a need to get them done in one sitting, as my own energy's been pretty low the last year too.
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>>107716
Digging a little deeper into the surrounding pages for better context, I’m sure that it’s Sakurajima being depicted here. Ansui mentions something about the Yakushimaru-ryu being connected to the Satsuma district in some way. Given how traditional he comes off, it seems likely that the flashback is taking place somewhere in Satsuma. Satsuma is located a ways northwest of Sakurajima, though not all that far from the look of it (both are in the same prefecture of southern Kyushu), and with Sakurajima typically erupting out of the southern peak, it makes sense that with that sort of angle, the actual eruption site wouldn’t be directly visible.

I’m willing to guess that, if not an actual location the Satsuma area, the shrine or temple that Ansui and Houzan are in is likely styled after other cave and cliff buddhist temples like the Sanbutsu-ji (Three Buddha Temple) in Honshu’s Tottori Prefecture. The outward architecture is extremely similar to its Nageire-do (Flung-up Hall), the architecture and location are so unique as to be deemed a national treasure of Japan. Incidentally, Yakushi Nyorai is not one of the Buddhas the Sanbutsu-ji was dedicated to (those being Shaka Nyorai, Amida Nyorai and Dainichi Nyorai), so it doesn’t seem a huge stretch to me that a similar one focused on Yakushi Nyorai and the Twelve Divine Generals.
mokey
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Typesetter here. Hope everyone else had a good Christmas and New Years. Having to borrow a family member’s computer to post at the moment, as mine has been broken for quite a while now. It’s just a cooling issue resulting in swift and constant crashing, so I don’t think any of the chapters, notes, or other data have been lost, but I still can’t work on anything until it gets completely sorted out, nor can I access my files as they were on an internal drive that still had space. Figures this happens right as a new external drive to copy a back up of the manga folders to arrived. In any case, things seem to finally be heading toward resolution here, after post-holiday delays regarding tech support and a local shop making a mistake on warranty returns. With any luck I should be back in business for typesetting and research in the next week or so, depending on shipping turnaround time. I’ll post more of an update then.

In the meantime, something interesting: I recall something about Makura’s design being based on the Golden Langur, properly known as Gee's Golden Langur, I think (can’t access my working files to easily verify at the moment)? Certainly fitting to use a primate from India in a work with strong Buddhist and Hindu elements, but it struck me as weird given her hair coloring in the color cover pages is decidedly not so golden/orangish. Turns out though that golden langurs are so called because the males have that golden color. Females and young though have more of a much lighter/whiter color, albeit with a cream tone in parts. Makes me wonder if, with Makura being male in the original novels, he was described as golden/orange in contrast. Granted, this is if Makura of both sorts was indeed a Golden Langur, or if I'm remembering wrong.
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>>109634
Take your time, king.
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Okay, so my computer’s not overheating anymore, and my image editor isn’t making the fans sound like a fat PS3 taking off. I think we’re back in business. Or at least, I am. Can only speak for myself.

>>109634
Disregard that about the golden langur; I’d thought there was some sort of special name for what Makura’s design was based on, and that seemed the only one that stood out in a list. Now that I have access to the omake files again, to make sure things are correct, Itoh says she’s a Hanuman langur. There are a number of different names for that species, the most common in English seeming to be “northern plains gray langur”, but there’s also the "(Bengal) sacred langur". Regardless, both sexes have fur that ranges from whitish-gray to what I'd consider middle-gray, depending on the area of the body. They’re apparently rather sociable, not only with each other, but even other species, often hanging out around chital deer, with both species reacting to each others’ alarm calls, benefiting from each having a focus on different senses. Gray langurs will also even groom rhesus macaques (same biological family of Cercopithecidae, but not the same genus or species). Could be a factor in Makura having such a friendly temperament, but that's just me wondering now

That aside, on the point of typesetting, I’ve been thinking it might be better to get roughs out and up for proofreading sooner rather than later. This would mean that visual edits to the pages (stitches, cleared SFX, titles for some chapters) would have to come later when the stitcher is back, or if we wind up needing to find another for it, but at least we could still make progress on the main script. Not saying that as intent to rush things; just that being able to make some progress is better than no progress. That, and the sooner I can get things from proprietary working files to pngs that can be re-edited in different programs, the better, in case more computer problems arise.

Anyhow, regarding research, I don’t want to overwhelm things right now chapters and chapters of possibly noteworthy things, so I’ll bump with a focus on a few points right now, regarding the imagery of Chapter 21 and 22. The first of which regarding the overall Mesoamerican imagery, and the latter being the Buddhist imagery. I should probably preface this that it’s been a lot easier to find concrete stuff about the latter than the former here, and being a fever dream, it is possible that my thoughts could be reading too much into it. Point being, make of it what you will. I’m open to other theories.

Pic amusing, but not exactly related
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>>109709
Something I’d had a really tough time with in trying to find the inspirations/sources for the various Mesoamerican imagery in these two chapters, beyond things like the “King of Tula” statue and the snake and eagle mural has been that of (for lack of a better term) “liquid” Maya and the claws that grab her. My first thought was to try to link her to some sort of water deity, but Mayan mythology doesn’t seem to have a female one. Aztec/Mexica myth however does, in the form of Chalchiuhtlicue
 (“Chal-chee-oot-lee-kway”; “She of the Jade Skirt”), a goddess of both water and fertility. She was considered the female counterpart to Tlaloc, as either his wife or sister (both?), and bore his children, the Tlaloques. 

This is interesting, since while I haven’t found any outright analogous Mayan water goddess for Chalchiuhtlicue, Tlaloc is thought to have been inspired by the Mayan Chaac. Chaac is also thought to be analogous Mensabak in the later Lacandon pantheon, which would seem to suggest U Na'il Mensabak, his wife, to be analogous to Chalchiuhtlicue. This obviously connects well with Mikado being seen as a second coming of Mensabak/Metzabok, a storm god. Not much is said on U Na'il Mensabak other than her being Mensabak’s wife and apparently a storm goddess in her own right, but few female deities are given prevalence in the Lacandon pantheon from what I can see, other than U Na'il Hachakyum, who assisted her husband in creating life, and bore three other gods as children with him.

Another possibility for Maya’s role could be as Xochiquetzal/Ichpochtli, an earth goddess associated with beauty, fertility, love, pregnancy, childbirth, and womanly crafts. She’s always depicted as an attractive young woman (might have to take their word for it; codex artwork doesn’t exactly invoke that vibe, at least to me). According to the Codex Borgia, she was also a wife of Tlaloc (one prior to Chalchiuhtlicue), before she was kidnapped by Tezcatlipoca (IE: THE Tezcatlipoca; Black Tezcatlipoca), the northern lord of night.
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>>109710
What of the claw though? I went looking for something to connect that, be it to U Na'il Mensabak, Chalchiuhtlicue, or at least some story regarding Chaac losing something important to some animalistic deity. The key seemed to be in the design: the claws seem to be reptilian, or more likely avian in nature; perhaps a large bird of prey. I’d seen prior that king vultures do play a role in some Mayan myths, such as how after a spat regarding being treated badly by her husband, [Sun], [Moon] is found crying by vultures. After telling them of the reasons, they whisk her off to the palace of the king vulture, and Sun tracks them down to bring her back, in a series of events that eventually leads to King Vulture’s teeth being replaced with maize kernels (tying this tale in some to that of Vucub Caquix, “Seven Macaw”, of the K'iche' Popol Vuh). And while not representing the sun, the vulture still flies toward and interacts with it, and is the keeper of bright things such as fire, day, and even the moon.

Some photos of king vultures I’ve seen also have noticeably dark feet and claws, though given their habit of engaging in “urohidrosis”, or pissing/shitting on their legs and feet to cool off, it’s hard to say if that’s the actual color of their flesh.

That said, in general, the Maya seem to have had a lot of respect for vultures, as have other Meso-and -South American cultures. It was and is not seen as associated with death in a negative way, but rather a positive one, doing what is necessary to return life to the earth (which obviously fits well with the Maya emphasis on repeating cycles). Not a harbinger of death, but “a transformer of death”, to quote Elizabeth Benson’s “The Vulture: The Sky and the Earth”. They also do not hunt; their feet are used to place their weight on carcasses, but they do not have strong grasping muscles in them, unlike hawks and eagles that actively attack prey. So I came to doubt that a vulture is what Itoh and/or Baku intended by the talon.
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>>109711
Sticking with the imagery though, I continued to look around for something relating a bird of prey, fire, and a kidnapping. Nothing relevant to the Maya came up, but one name that did recur in results was Huitzilopochtli, of the Aztec/Mexica pantheon and the Blue Tezcatlipoca. At first I dismissed it upon seeing that his name means something like “Left-handed Hummingbird”, “Blue Hummingbird on the Left”, or “Southern Hummingbird” depending on the source (latter seems likely; south was associated with left to the Aztec); those clearly aren’t dainty little hummingbird feet. However, looking more into it, despite the meaning behind his name, Huitzilopochtli was a war god who was also associated with both the sun as well as fire (via his weapon, the fire serpent Xiuhcoatl). He is also given connection to eagles due to his role in the Mexica myth of them leaving Aztlan and founding Tenochtitlan, guiding them by saying they would settle where they found an eagle on a cactus eating a snake. The connection between him and hummingbird within his name seems to have given rise to an Aztec belief that hummingbirds are the souls of slain warriors

The war god connection would work very well to connect him to Houzan. Problem is, Huitzilopochtli seems to have no connection to kidnapping women.

Looking at the aforementioned (Black) Tezcatlipoca, the “Smoking Mirror” (IE: Obsidian) certainly has the kidnapping element down. He was also an Aztec war god in his own right; that is “a god of change through conflict”, as well as a trickster and creator god, so not exactly evil. Given his association with night and darkness, direct depictions of his figure were often considered inadequate or impossible; perhaps it's not the talon is emerging from flame, but darkness given a temporary form? And he had a rivalry with his brother Quetzalcoatl, and is said to be the one responsible for the latter’s exile from Tollan. However, his main nagual counterpart wasn’t a bird or reptile but a jaguar named Tepeyollotl (“Mountain Heart”). Codex art suggests it have been a standard jaguar in design, so not the pitch black type like Noh Ek’s Ek Chuah. A second nagual is known, Chalchihuihtotolin, “Jade Turkey”, which was a bird, but whose traits were sorcery, disease, and plague, but also cleansing of contamination, absolution of guilt, and overcoming of fate.
Replies: >>109713
>>109712
Being that this is a fever dream, I wouldn’t be surprised if Mikado’s brain is conflating elements of these various gods with each other. Liquid Maya might be considered to combine Chalchiuhtlicue’s water aspect with Xochiquetzal/Ichpochtli attractiveness, youth, and being kidnapped. The talon, obviously representing Houzan in the plot, has elements of both Huitzilopochtli and Tezcatlipoca. Having Maya taken from him and his rivalry with Houzan, this would leave Mikado standing in for both Tlaloc and Quetzalcoatl.

Why Aztec though? Well, considering this, and the other Mesoamerican imagery in these two chapters being from a spread of cultures, I would think it’s making an allusion of Mikado’s quest to get Maya back, and his acceptance of his transformation into a Dokkaku Soldier, to the spread of the Cult of the Feathered Serpent from the western parts of Mexico east to the Yucatan. A lot of the more nature-affiliated Aztec deities seem to have been borrowed from the Maya and other prior cultures, similar to how many Roman deities were inspired by Greek ones (though the Greeks may have been the first to write them down in a language we can understand today; the earlier Minoan “Linear A” still hasn’t been deciphered). The feathered serpent though wasn’t one of these, or at least only gained major importance among the Maya later. Seemingly originating with the Olmec (the earliest depictions apparently being in a cave in the central gulf coast of Mexico), it was picked up on by the Teotihuacanos, the Toltecs, the Aztecs as Quetzalcoatl, and finally the Maya, where the Cult of Kukulkan seemed to flourish along the northern Yucatan among the Ah Itza Maya in the Post-classic. The Yucatec Maya still call it Kukulkan (even being one of the few deities among the Lacandon to not only be analogous to a classic Maya god, but have mostly kept its name intact as K’uk’ulkan), while the K’iche’ refer to it by “Q’uq’umatz” and “Tohil”.

You can also sort of trace Mikado’s path across these chapters, going from the baking desert, encountering himself as “The King of Tula”, escaping it through the “Atlantean Figure” warrior statues found atop Pyramid B (AKA the “Pyramid of the Morning Star”, or “Pyramid of Quetzalcoatl”) at the Toltec ruins known as Tula Grande, to a desert lake. After transforming, he seems to fly over a city with pyramids resembling those of Teotihuacan, with an Aztec priest looking on (that specific double headed serpent icon is an Aztec symbol, though I’ve never heard of one on a staff), before seemingly settling upon El Castillo or some very similar Mayan pyramid.

Anyhow, that’s what I’ve managed to find on the topic. Moving on to something more tangible but still interesting.
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>>109713
Buddhist imagery:
>The Wheel of Dharma:
The lines relating to this, also known as the Dharmachakra, are said to have been spoken by the Gautama Buddha, with his first sermon on The Four Noble Truths being the first time the wheel turned. Dharma is commonly understood to be cosmic order, virtue, and duty of the religious or moral sort. The wheel is thought to be wisdom, knowledge, and insight; to “turn” this wheel is to bring great, universal change, and it can only be done by an exceptional person. It seems like this wheel is said to have been turned three times in the past

>A Spectral Form:
The imagery of Mikado, with a physical body in the foreground, and a spectral form above and behind him, relates to the Hindu and Buddhist concept of human life existing on two planes. The physical body, (sthula sarira) has mass and inhabits the physical plane, while the non-physical “subtle body” (sukshma sarira) exists in the plane of the mind or psyche, and is comprised of node points for chakra, or psychic energy, and connecting energy channels called nadi. The body influences the mind and the mind influences the body.

Both Hinduism and Buddhism feature the aforementioned chakra, though there are some differences: namely, from what I encountered, while Buddhist texts mention five major chakra points in the subtle body, Hinduism speaks of as many as seven. Mikado's sukshma sarira is shown with seven.

>Chakravarti:
Written as “tenrinjouou” (転輪聖王) in Japanese, chakravarti is a sanskrit term for an ideal, universal ruler. There are three types of these Indian kings: the chakravala chakravarti which rules over all four ancient continents, dvipa chakravarti that rules only one, and pradesha chakravarti as a local king. In Buddhism, the Chakravartin are “those through which the Wheel of Dharma turns”, is a secular counterpart to a Buddha, and refers to both temporal and spiritual leadership, whereas in Hinduism, their dominion covers the entire earth. Buddhists also have a belief that, once a Chakravarti emerges, the Meitreya Buddha, or Buddha of the Future, will appear upon the earth. 

I would also argue that, when it comes to the page this is on itself, it would likely be better to just leave the kanji in the bubbles, position them in the center of each with the furigana cleared as simply part of the the visual, and then include the meaning for them as a note at the top of the page. Simply put, it's a little hard to follow the way it's otherwise structured in English, given the way the kanji are individually separated and meant to be read top right to bottom left (I also tried the text vertically as well; it didn't work either). I don't think trying to directly translate it as "The Holy / King of / Turning / Chakra" inside them as with the previous version of the chapter is the best answer either.
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How are things going?
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Typesetter here. I’d been waiting to see if either of the other guys would at least check in. Been transcribing the raw script for another manga to copypastable text documents in the meantime, where the existing English versions have real problems from what I can tell (such as the script being heavily trimmed down; why does a medium where font sizes and character width are easy to control warrant doing that?) and the Japanese version only exists as warped, bound scans. Thankfully it’s not a long series and I’m about three-quarters done there as of now. Once I am, I guess I’ll go ahead and write up the log for chapter 17, and post the work in progress for them, even if they’re not apt to be stitched or have SFX cleared any time soon. 

Some more notes for Chapter 22 for the time being:

In addition to making that blatant reference to the manga Futari Ecchi where it shows Makura dreaming about going all naked apron for Mikado, the way she greets him upon waking up is a reference to manga and OVA Kyukyoku Chojin R, with her way of saying “good morning” (おはやう; “ohayau”) and hand pose being that same that the titular character R-kun uses there. I sort of think that, if there’s a particular way the English versions of that manga and OVA write that greeting to reflect the non-standard “ohayou”, it would probably be good to have Makura do the same here for consistency. If not, we can just leave it as a note.

The two page spread with Mikado’s eyes looking over a cityscape in the background depicts a view of central Tokyo in the background as seen from Odaiba, a man-made island located in Tokyo Bay going back to the 1850s. Originally, it was meant to serve as a defensive military structure (hence the name, as "daiba" means "fort"), but now serves as a seaport, commercial hub, residential district, and entertainment venue. It has various attractions and landmarks: both the replica of the American Statue of Liberty and the Rainbow Bridge are shown on the spread, but there’s also the Daikanransha Ferris Wheel and the Gundam Base Tokyo that used to house an RX-78-2 Gundam Ver.GFT (since replaced with the Unicorn Gundam). In essence, there’s an unstated-in-text implication that Mikado and Makura were transferred from Hokkaido all the way back to Tokyo while he was out cold. I would guess at least some `native Japanese readers would recognize it visually, so we should probably put a note on the spread itself of “Odaiba, Tokyo” to make that readily clear for English readers.

Odaiba was also notably the location of Japan’s first “Doraemon Future Department Store”, which might tangentially serve to explain why, in the two of them coming to Odaiba, Audrey’s reaction Zenobia’s explanation of her choice in gun is that she’s referring to Doraemon. Considering they’re both westerners, I assume she’s actually familiar with Terminator and just making a locale joke about the situation.
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>>110264
Translator here, sorry for not checking in sooner. I'm up for working on the series again, although the situation mentioned in >>107714 is never going to change (life goes on). Anyway, I'm still keeping an eye on the thread.
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>>110286
Good to see you around again. Almost done transcribing what I mentioned above (got two more chapters there; the site hosting the raw page photos having been suddenly out of service the other night emphasized the importance of archiving the original text as a form of future proofing), so I should probably have 17's roughs ready by Tuesday at the latest, if not sooner.
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>>110286
Still working on the changelog here (should still be done tomorrow night), but for the time being, if it's not too much to ask, could I get a fresh translation parse of p_138 here when you have time?

I got curious as to if the raw mentioned "emotion" in the top half as much as the prior English script did. I only see 情動 once on the page, in the first bubble, while seishin (精神) - spirit, or perhaps "mind" - is used a lot more. Makes me wonder if Kawabata is more explaining Thalamus vs Anti-Thalamus as more akin to "Spiritualism vs Materialism" philosophical debate, and that the former isn't what he considers compatible with actual science. 

Also, does his response to Mikado in panel 4 still tie back to this difference in theory in the raw? I mean, I could see Godai focusing less on trying to get them to side with him based purely on scientific theory alone, and more of the potential application of it benefiting them if he has easy access to studying them, rather than something separate. That, and from what I recall from chapter 93, Tigi-tigil basically confirms his theory and application of it actually have a chance of working after all, at least regarding what she knows of her own tribe.
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>>110318
The translation uses "emotions" as an overall cover for 感情, 心理, and 精神, which as you noted is not really correct. It likely had more to do with keeping the theme clear, as Kawabata claims that human beliefs, attitudes, and feelings cannot control physical matter (and thus cannot be responsible for Zombist's transformations). We could make several changes:

>Thus, he concluded that deep-seated emotions would control the changes themselves.
<Thus, he concluded that it was the patient's unconscious mind that was controlling the changes.

>Emotions do not control physical matter!
<The mind does not rule over matter!
#Note: I think Kawabata is explicitly referring to the common phrase "mind over matter" in a demeaning fashion here.

>Rather, physical reactions are what make us see the dream we call "emotion"!
<Physical reactions create the dream we call "the mind"!
#If this is too vague, we can swap "the mind" for "the spirit" or "the soul" to make it clear he isn't talking about the physical brain.

As for panel 4, it's a response to Mikado saying that Zombist couldn't care less about theories: Kawabata then explains that Godai claimed he could reverse the transformation to get Zombist to join his side. In short, it plays out like you said. (Also like you said, the story eventually makes it clear that Kawabata is wrong and Godai is right.)
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>>110343
Thanks mate. I’ll go ahead and get those updated now

One more thing I noticed while working on the log last night (spent way too long digging into this; should have it all done by tomorrow morning): Checking the English terminology with Mikado’s “science lesson” to Makura on p_146, it feels to me like the way 退化 is being used is referring to two separate things in English. That Makura’s trying to use it in the way some in English would say “Evolution? More like devolution, right?”, hence Mikado correcting her that evolution has no antonym, but the definition he gives for 退化 really doesn’t correspond to what I see are considered translations for the word. In English biology, “degeneration” or “degeneracy” refers to two structurally dissimilar components can be interchangeable under certain circumstances but absolutely distinct under others, while “retrogression” or “retrograde evolution” seem a bit too broad in scope, having more of a “return to monkey” vibe than Mikado’s (and thus Baku’s/Itoh’s) definition, which might explain why neither seems to be an “official” term for the process. Rather, the closest term I’ve found in English that fits with his definition is “vestigiality”.

So, am I missing something here, or is this a case where the Japanese term properly covers both topics, but in which warrants separate ones in English? I’m guessing the intent of the flow of conversation here was some self-degrading wordplay from Makura over her condition (“shinka” vs “taika”; hence the “evolution” “devolution” comparison above), and I’m fine with keeping “degeneration” there as it still fits the visual image. But being that Mikado not only explains why the face-value idea of it being the opposite of evolution is false, but goes on to define it as it’s own term, it strikes me that if we use “degeneration”, or perhaps “retrogression”, there too, then the definition doesn’t match, but if we just replace it for “vestigiality”, then it loses its connection to the flow of conversation. If this is the case, I’ve thought that perhaps using some text in parenthesis to keep the ideas better connected in English would better preserve the flow of discussion, but let me know what you think on the matter, or if there's a better way to handle this. It’s probably something that warrants a proper note on regardless.
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Got delayed with family stuff the other morning after finishing the log here. Anyhow, roughs for Chapter 17:

>General: English sound effect layers are all made, but for now, I’m just going to include ones that are either handled via note or that could be properly cleared from the panels in the roughs. Otherwise they'll look messier than intended for the finished pages.

>p_126
Rephrased the second bubble to format more evenly.

>p_127
“leaving hints” in panel 3 to “dropping hints”. Rephrased bubble 2. “Not just that” to “not only that in panel 4 to sound more natural. I took a look at the raw line for the second bubble; it seems like Gen is remarking less on Houzan’s actual moves in reaction and more on how quickly he did (and thus Gen’s own plans moving faster). Rephrased/rearranged the text in the bubbles in panel 5 to flow better as one sentence. To double check though, is Gen speaking in terms of either/or there, or does the raw suggest more that he aims to make them do both (“and”)? I’d also think it wise to work in the “logistical” angle from “後方支援” into the English; that is, being that we have the full manga’s story, Cherubim doesn’t seem like they’d be willing to risk being in-person backup, rather than working in the background regarding finances or negotiating supplies.

>p_128
Panel 1 reads kind of oddly, given the context of the previous page’s dialogue. Maybe something more along the lines of “Or at least,”//”That’s what I’m thinking.” Rephrased panel 2’s bubbles to flow better as one sentence.

>p_129
Rephrased the first bubble; I’m not sure that “bottleneck” is the right term for the issues Gen brings up there. I’ve usually heard that term most regarding things like genetic or population bottlenecks. Sort of feel like “hurdles” might get idea of moral concerns across better; that maybe they could be worked past, but it’s just too much effort compared to the payoff. Move the “but” from bubble 2 to 3. Added a “for sure” to the first bubble in panel 2. Revised the bubbles in panel 3. it feels like they should be a continuation of the same thought the previous panel ends on, and thus one sentence. Given his statement a few pages prior about layman, the second ought to be “so I like” rather than “and I like” as he’s acknowledging himself to be the same. The last bubble seems to be less him wanting to be in control of events, and more of people as things or tools (支配できものが好きなのです), given the topic of Mikado being possibly more useful as a D-2, as well as the panel visual. Granted, I’m sure he likes to have things go his way in general, but still. Swapped to “things I can control as I please.”
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>>110367
>p_130
The bubbles in panel 1 are a little weird. I’m not entirely sure if “sort out” is the best way to put it, given Gen’s mindset. Someone like him would likely rather reduce or cut out what they can’t trust to work for them. Also just to double-check, the idea there is him implying that Kawabata is a potential risk he’d likely have the girls take out if he couldn’t be used to attract Dokkaku soldiers? For the last bubble, “has” feels a bit unnecessary in the line.

>p_131
Revised the first bubble to sound more natural. It still feels like something is missing though; is there implication that the soldiers (Mihira aside) were stationed there, or being held there? I mean, we see Majira strapped up like an asylum inmate, but does it seem that Sandira, Vajra, and Vikarala were also possible hazards to their own group and would have been under similar treatment we just don’t see? “I rushed back” in bubble 3 to “we rushed back”, being that Makura was and is with him. Reworded the note regarding “cessna”. Rephrased panel 2’s bubbles a bit. “But they didn’t.” to “But they never showed.” (or maybe “never arrived” might be better?) in panel 3; there doesn’t seem to be a hint of “next thing you know” in the fourth bubble, so I’m not sure where that came from. Reworded to “And then there was the insurrection this morning…”

>p_132
Rephrased most bubbles a bit for more of a natural read.

>p_133
Rephrased the third bubble to flow better from the second as one sentence. Replaced “A meditation ball?” with “A baoding ball?”, as that's the proper name for such items. We can explain it on the notes page. To double check though, what sort of sound effect is that “Teuiiin” supposed to represent there? Thinking that if it’s meant to represent the light glinting off of it, or perhaps a light ringing sound (most baoding balls apparently have a chime in them that a smaller, interior ball or marble rings when they come into contact), we can make the sound more clear in English.
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>>110368
>p_136
Rephrased the panel 1’s bubbles a bit. Replaced Kawabata’s “Impressive” with the raw’s “Hoh?” I mean, I get that he’s making that expression because he’s impressed, but if someone whistled in that situation in a movie, I wouldn’t subtitle it as a proper word. Just my take on it. Added a hyphen to Kawabata’s listing of the number in panel 3 to be correct in English (at least to my knowledge). Fixed the panel 4 flashback to Sindura’s line to sync with the original one, as the raw text matches it. “I understand now” in panel 5 to “I get it now”. Regarding Mikado’s remark on beasts, I have to ask: given the context, is it more likely he’s indeed saying animals wouldn’t enjoy causing a massacre, or that animals wouldn’t massacre for fun? Like, is he implying they didn’t have to slaughter everyone on their way out, or that they did so with unnecessary “creativity”? For what it’s worth, a few animals do seem to kill not for sustenance, territory, or self defense, but because they find the hunt fun and/or are driven to by instinct, like cats. Not to mention tormenting their prey. But killing almost two dozen other creatures in one sitting for fun is pretty much out of the question for anything but humans. Makura’s lines seemed strange from the previous English version; looking at the raw text, it sounds more like she’s saying the scientists were given the chance to confirm for themselves that they’d made exactly what they set out to. I’ve got it worded here around that, but could someone verify what her lines there indeed should be (自分らでこさえた殺戮兵器の性能の高さを // 自分らの身をもっと確認できたやん)?

>p_137
Similar to the previous question, if that is the context, is Makura here still just referring to the lab staff with “everyone” (IE: “Wasn’t that what everyone wanted?”), or perhaps both them and the Dokkaku soldiers as a sort of morbid “win-win” (IE: “Everyone got what they wanted, right?”)? Rephrased the second bubble in panel 3. “whole body” to “full body” in bubble 3.

>p_138
Rephrased the first bubble in panel 2. Reordered the bubbles in panel 3, and tweaked the lines in panel 4 to read more naturally, as well as better connect how Godai sold them on his theory even if they wouldn’t care for the actual science behind it.

>p_139
Given how staunchly Kawabata seems to disagree with Godai on the previous page, I feel like a terse “Of course not!” has a bit more dismissal of the idea than “Of course he can’t do it!” Though “できるものか!” Almost reads more like a question (so maybe “How could he!?”). Does Mikado’s second bubble in panel 2 come off as a topic switch in the raw, or more like one would anticipate him wanting more clarity on a prior point? With the last bubble, “why weren’t you there” was something already explained in terms of being away from the site; reworded to “Why didn’t you take part in the rebellion?”
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>>110369
>p_140
In the first panel, “left out of this one” sounds like it’s specifically this event she was left out of; does the raw come off more generally? If so, maybe “I was left out of the loop.” “my differing opinions” in panel 2 to “having differing opinions”. “I suppose” in bubble 4 to “I guess” to format more evenly. “Your shape” in panel 4 feels unnatural; replaced with “Your figure”. “convenience stores” in plural in panel 5; I doubt she only uses a single one.

>p_141
“Besides all that,” feels a bit weird when she’s up to this point only explained one reason; shortened to “Besides,”. Rephrased the second bubble. In the second panel, I can see how trying to spread “What” over both bubbles isn’t easy as Japanese where it’s two discrete syllables, but I don’t feel like “What?” // “Really?” is the best solution either. I’d think something more like “What…” // “did you just-!?” works a bit better with the look on Mikado’s face, but let me know if there’s something better and shorter. Added a “case” to the second bubble in panel 3. Rephrased the third bubble a bit. Rephrased the last bubble in panel 4, the second bubble in panel 5 to format better.

>p_142
I’ve been seeing more material show up during notes research (China seems to have a long record of cannibalism) referring to what is discussed in the aside “Ancient China two-legged mutton” than “Ancient China two-legged sheep”. Maybe "mutton" would be a better term to use here? On the other hand, I've tried to source this terminology, and a book by one Dieter Kuhn ("The Age of Confucian Rule") seems to be the first in English to do so, by way of citing a report from a Chinese diarist made in the 1300s. Said book though was from 2009, thus releasing after Kouya, so perhaps it's actually best to stick to "sheep"? Kawabata’s first line in the third panel feels a bit odd, given he was speaking more about people prior. I’d suggest something like “Naturally, those infected with DV-0 do not exhibit cannibalistic desires.” Rephrased the second bubble to format better.
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>>110370
>p_145
“That?” to “Huh?”; “Why did I…” // “Why did I come here?” to “Why did…” // “Why did I come all the way out here?”. Alternatively, “What did I come out here for?” Rephrased the third bubble in panel 4 to flow better. Panel 5, revised the first bubble to make more sense, as usually viruses have specific types of organisms they’re capable of infecting, and are more or less inert in those not susceptible to them. Is there more detail to Mikado’s aside in the bottom panel in the raw? Just wondering, since while what’s there isn’t exactly wrong, one of the details regarding regarding convergent evolution is the traits separate lines of organisms evolve within that same environment is that said traits are beneficial to anything filling that same niche (IE: ichthyosaurs and dolphins both look a lot like fish because the fish body plan is extremely well-suited for movement in the water). I’m not sure I’d say only animals do either, though given there are only animals in the zodiac, and thus only animal Dokkaku Soldiers, I think it’s fair to leave alone here. Rephrased Kawabata’s lines a bit to render better.

>p_146
Rephrased panel 1 and 2’s bubbles to read more naturally. Fixed “Pteranodon” to “Pterosaur” (翼竜), since Sindura aside, the others are broad family groups (a pteranodon is a type of pterosaur, but not all pterosaurs are pteranodons; rhamphorhynchid and azhdarchid wings follow the same basic layout too, suggesting it's ancestral to all of them). Again, let me know if my thinking here >>110348 regarding the bottom half of the page is on the right track, and what the best way to handle the issue of retaining the relatedness of the raw Japanese term in English would be if so.

Going to give the next page its own post, because fucking hell.
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>>110371
>p_147
Rephrased the large bubble in the first panel to read more naturally. That said, I’d wonder if “mechanism” might not be better as plural. As to the background bubbles, these have proven pretty challenging to figure out, given parts are obscured (more-so the second than the first), and given English the differences in both grammar/syntax and how English is written, we can’t just obscure the same parts as the raw. I’ve spent a long time digging into what information is there (as was mentioned up here >>106834 ), since the best way to handle this would be to try to some assemble lines in English that still feel like coherently structured based on what’s obscured, rather than merely just the legible the terms in the raw. The full ones I’ve compiled are:
<メラノサイトでとカロテノイド色素{obscured}共存効果
>“The way there’s a coexistence effect between melanocytes and carotenoid pigments,” 
<{obscured}微細構造{obscured}による干渉{obscured}ジエチルスチ{obscured}
>“or disruption of crossover interference caused by ultrastructure level exposure to diethylstilbestrol.” 
At least, that’s what I get from the raw text trying to parse it for grammar flow. I could be wrong. 

That said, while I know the intent here is intelligent yet ultimately unimportant information (hence the obscuring and Makura’s reaction), it does raise the question of what exactly Mikado is talking about. I would assume it to be something actually scientific, but I really haven’t found much that connect either with each other (hence thinking they might be separate ideas; Kawabata’s response changed from “in that case” to “in those cases”). At least, from an English perspective anyway. Maybe the Japanese text might lead to something that better links it all together?

This might be something that should be returned to in the future; if anything regarding them is found, the lines might warrant revising, along with a note for the notes page for any readers actually curious about it. But the most I can think is that melanocytes, or rather, the melanin they produce, serves a similar role to carontenoid pigments, the latter of which nearly all animals are unable to produce (we get it from what we eat), yet seems to have been repurposed to serve a role in coloring display features (like feathers), and immune system and vision health. An evolutionary pattern like this is called “exaptation”. The other I really don’t get, other than that the 干渉 mentioned is likely referring to “crossover interference” during meiotic recombination of genes, as opposed to “viral interference”, which is when one virus blocks the host cell from being infected by another virus, or separate unit of the same virus (sort of like the effect in Pokemon where having one status effect blocks most of the rest). Crossover interference, despite how it sounds, is actually a good thing and a normal part of the recombination process, so disrupting that could lead to negative genetic effects. Not really sure how diethylstilbestrol (or perhaps "diethylstyrene”? Not entirely clear from what kana is there) fits into that though, and it certainly doesn’t help that I’d estimate we’re missing like 2/3 of the full line there.

Anyway, rephrased the first bubbles in both panels 2 and 3 to read more naturally. Also added a note to the top of the page defining “Junk DNA”, and why it might be safely co-opted by the virus.
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>>110372
>p_148
“to its maximum” to “to their maximum” in the first bubble; added an “out” to “seek” in the second. Rephrased the first two bubbles in panel 2 to both better work with the raw’s stammering, as well as make it more clear the text is talking about the intergroup cannibalism, and not them just them hunting down and eating random unaffiliated army troops. “is addressed” to “winds up getting addressed” in panel 3. Do we still want to go with “That’s incredible…” for Mikado’s なんて話だ・・ in the last panel, or would something like “That’s some story…” be better? Last, it looks like Makura’s aside s referring to 知恵熱, which while it translates to “brain fever”, that seems to have a different connotation on its own in English (actual brain inflammation). I’d still like to work that “thinking” aspect into it better, so maybe “Thinking too hard gave me a fever.”? I’m guessing this is a colloquialism of some sort?

>p_149
Added an “only” to the first bubble in panel 2. “certainly” to “surely” in panel 3. “Houzan and his gang’s whereabouts” in panel 4 to “the whereabouts of Houzan and his gang”.

>p_151
“Oomph” to “Ugh…” in the first panel. The “Kuukuu” sounds and such seem to be what is often called a “roll” or “grumble, and is meant as an intimidating or threatening vocalization, and are made by orangutans of either sex. They have a number of calls overall, but mostly seem to communicate via gestures; Incidentally, the “hooting” seen from them in later chapters is a distress call associated with infant orangutans (perhaps to call an adult for help; young orangutans stay in their parental group until 10 or 11 from what I read). These sounds don’t seem to have specific English onomatopoeia tied to them, and trying to listen to videos of such, there's too much background environmental noises to really figure out the best direct transcription into English, so I suppose it’s fine to just use Itoh’s own take for what is being “said”.
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>>110374
>p_152
“Scree” to “Giii!”, though perhaps I should find some videos of orangutans. Just to double check, do we want to stick with the names Seitaka and Kongara for Makura’s orangutan friends, or their original Sanskrit names of Cetaka and Kimkara? I know there’s no artwork in the series that shows their names written in Latin, the way the Dokkaku Soldiers themselves do, but do you think it’s more likely they were intended to be named following similarly Sanskrit patterns, or given their association specifically with Makura, would she have sprung for the Japanese equivalents? Either’s fine with me; I know we don’t exactly have their history. I just thought that if there’s a time to bring it up, it’s now. “What happened!?” in the last panel to “What’s wrong!?”

>p_153
Rephrased the bubbles in panel 5 to read more naturally.

>p_154
Added an “either” to the third bubble.

I’ll work on refining the notes pages once we nail down all the topics. Probably not going to have roughs read until around this time next week though (going to be busy the first half of next week).
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>>110375
Board ate the last pages, I guess.
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Translator here. Like clockwork, my life got shittier right on time. I will proofread as soon as I can.
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>>110535
And I fucked up the sage, what a week.
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>>110536
No rush; take your time. Still trying to get my energy back to normal here from some medical tests last week to get the notes finished

As an aside, I've also found that the Japanese dish soap Kusakabe is using while complaining about Andira on the title spread for chapter 18, "Mama Pockety" ("ママポケッティ"; latter two kana partially obscured in art), was indeed an actual product from Lion that existed between 1989 and 1999, at least from what I can tell. While it could well be that Zombist just reuses old bottles and such that they find convenient, it could also help further hint that the manga takes place around the same time the original books themselves were being released.
I love Makura so much, bros
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>>111384
Based
>>110376
God she's so hot I need to return to monky.
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Guys?
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>>111936
Typesetter here. Still waiting for QA from our proofreader on the previous chapter here. That is, I don’t want to be overloading the guy with more stuff than that for the time being when he seems to be pretty busy with life as is.

As an aside though, I’ve been looking into Baku and Itoh's Yamigarishi Chimera Tenryhuuhen from the angle of it’s potential as a future scanlation project. It’s certainly interesting, both in its own right and as sort of a bridge between pre-and-post hiatus Kouya (IE: end of volume 9 and start of volume 10), and wouldn’t be that long as a two volume series. Also notice a fair bit of crossover in themes, though whether similarities such as how the “far-reaching spiral dream” manifests, or that the ancient "鬼埋螺" corpse looks a hell of a lot like Kukulkan’s mummified remains in Kouya (minus the jade mask and plus some extra faces), are just Itoh’s own style, or some sort of shared vision between the original Kouya and Chimera Kou novels on Baku’s part, I’m not sure. And while clearly intended to be aimed at fans of Yamigarishi and Chimera Kou, being a shared prequel to both, it seems like more of its own standalone thing, so I don’t think there’d be too many instances where English readers would get totally lost in not having access to the actual novel series.

I do see some possible drawbacks that could make it sort of tough though. Like Kouya, it would still need a stitcher and occasional redrawing, at the very least for when main script text is laid over the background at points, but also someone not only versed in Japanese language but, given the overall-foreign-from-Japan setting, also Chinese language/reading of names and Taiwanese folklore (for example, I can find a bit about what a 小鬼, or Xiaogui, is, but not 強方, or... "Goifan" seems to be how the Japanese are meant to read it, but maybe "Qiang Fang" in Mandarin? Not sure.). The only pre-existing scans (which are the ones I’ve been looking at) are a volume 1 tankoubon and a compilation of Takuma Shoten’s Comic Ryu chapters as a makeshift volume 2, so it strikes me that proper consistency would be more welcome to readers. Tankoubon format would cut out a fair amount of text clearing from where the monthly releases have additional tagline or “catcher” text the tankoubon lacks.

Anyhow, I know it’s not the ideal time to consider adding more to the plate when Kouya’s gotten so slow as is, but just thought I might give my thoughts on it as I was curious enough to look more into it.
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>>111939
Finishing up skimming over Yamigarishi Chimera Tenryuuhen for connections (in having Baku and Itoh as writer and artist again), there’s some solar symbolism that while clearly either relating to Buddhism or at least Taoism here, makes me wonder about if some of its usage in Kouya holds a deeper symbolic meaning than just that the ancient peoples of America had a shared emphasis of sun worship, often to bloody degrees. In Yamigarishi, it seems to be used as a visual for both Ranzou being at risk of being consumed by the power he’s invoked (a wrathful deity resembling Acala), as well as speculation of it as both the concepts of the “kikotsu” (“demon bone”; seems fictional for the work, but is defined as the eighth chakra, and located below the seventh chakra) and the eighth consciousness, named as alaya-vijnana, or storehouse consciousness. In Japanese, it’s known as the arayashiki, and is apparently defined in dictionaries as the “consciousness forming the base of all human existence”, and in the series with the following line 
“すべての人間の深層意識は・・・・・・時間や場所を超えて・・・・・・その最深部でつながっているという考え方がある・・・・・・”

Being that not only is Ranzou pulled back from the brink in front of the sun by Nori (whose either soul or consciousness is heavily burned in the process), but what they see within the “sun” leads them to understand what is motivating the titular chimera, there’s clearly some sort of communication going on even if it’s not actually occurring between them in person. Point being, it reminds me of the weird threeway sex and communication Mikado, Maya, and Karewara engage in late in Kouya, that specifically leads to Mikado and Karewara finally understanding each other. I never really got the sun imagery that was being used at that point, but if it’s being invoked in Yamigarishi for a particular reason, then maybe the same visual logic was at play here in Kouya? And if so, perhaps there's also more to it being used during Mikado's fever dream, where he's not within the sun, but being affected by it?
>>110367
>>110368
>>110369
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>>110371
>>110372
>>110374
>>110375
>>110376
Let me get the five-month-long translation done first:

127: The last bubble for panel 4 is missing a "the":
>of being Zombist's logistical backup, or even taking the blame when the time comes.

128: For panel 1, here's an alternate write-up that might sound more natural:
>Or rather,
>that's what I'd planned at first.

129: The changes look good and read well, nice job.

130: I agree about the first bubble: Gen's using 整理 more like making something "nice and neat" by removing variables, then admitting that he's willing to let the variable Kawabata exist beacuse he has value as bait. (And sure enough, Houzan "takes the bait" by killing Kawabata, instantly becoming an enemy in Kumbhira's eyes.)

131: It appears the Dokkaku soldiers were staying here, but there's no implication that they were sealed up Majira-style. With that said, Sindura wasn't happy, so they were probably being treated more like animals than humans. The changes look good to me.

132: This is only a suggestion, but maybe for panel 5,
>So the leader of Zombist is "Yakushimaru Houzan?"

133: The "Teuiiin" is the light ringing/chiming noise those balls make. Something like "ting~" could work, but I'm open to suggestions.

136: Like you said, animals do show pleasure in hunting and killing prey, so Mikado's line in panel 4 likely emphasizes the idea of killing for the sole purpose of fun. Perhaps something like
>Beasts don't slaughter and massacre just for fun!
if you feel like it should be changed.

For panel 8, your interpretation is the proper one, and the wording gets it across, good stuff.

137: The "win-win" is what Makura's cynically referring to. An alternative suggestion:
>Didn't everyone get what they wanted?

138: No issue with the changes.

139: "Of course not!" gets the feeling across best. Kawabata is a pompous ass (his use of この私 seals the deal) so such a curt denial is right up his alley. As for the topic switch, I feel it's kinda jarring in the raws too, so this works.

140: For panel 1, the raw indicates that Makura was left out of the group in general, not just for the rebellion. Perhaps:
>I've been kept out of the loop for a while now.
Or if that's adding too much assumed info,
>We've had a falling out of sorts.

continued
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>>112714
141: I think your change for panel 2 is a good compromise for the unsplittable English "what".

142: "Sheep" was a straight translation without any source, so "mutton" wins thanks to having one; if it's shown up as early as the 1300s then we English were simply late to make a note of it. (Thanks for going that far, by the way.)

146: The wordplay in question makes more sense in Japanese because 進化 casually looks like an opposite to 退化, given how 進 and 退 commonly mean "advance" and "retreat". Thus, Makura saying "devolution" makes sense since it is a verbal polar opposite to "evolution" that a layman would think makes sense, but it's also wrong because 退化 is actually vestigiality or degeneration.
In short, we have an untranslatable language issue. I would suggest keeping the quotes + parentheses like you had it set up, perhaps like this:
-panel 3-
>Evolution? (shinka?)
>More like devolution (taika), right?

-panel 5-
>"Evolution"* is when a living species systematically changes in a particular way. It's an irreversible process.

<It has no antonym.

>"Taika" is actually vestigiality, the loss of form or function of a single part or organ.
#Or we could use degeneration instead, but like you noted, it sounds rather close to devolution in negativity.

147: This is really going for the gold in translation effort, and I have to applaud the effort. With that said, I seriously don't know how deeply this topic can be mined without a much deeper understanding of the issue, and I'm afraid I don't have the will to do so. As it stands, I'm going to say it looks great and that the name-dropping of a synthetic estrogen might get some people to look it up.

148: I think "That's incredible..." gets the なんて part of the line across better; "That's some story..." is technically more accurate but IMO carries a kind of cynical/flippant air that isn't present in the raw. 知恵熱 is a joke about how an idiot's brain can overheat if he thinks too hard. We could go with
<Thinking too hard made my brain overheat.
if you want to keep that intact.

152: Seitaka/Cetaka and Kongara/Kimkara don't show up too many times, so I'd rather stick with the Japanese pronunciation for simplicity's sake.
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>>112715
Now for the bad part: it's pretty obvious that I took forever to do this. I have to admit that I can't keep up with the retranslation effort, so let me try one last thing before ending my participation entirely: are there are any specific chapters in particular you feel you could use my help with? If the number is relatively low, I could assist with them, but to be honest, it's glaringly obvious that I can't do much more than that anymore. I also think you're doing a good job cleaning up the text (and doing a stellar job on researching the deeper parts of the manga), to the point that I'm not really needed.
Either way, I have to say that I've had a great time with this manga and I'm glad I got to spend time working on it. Let me know if I can do some limited work in the future, or if you feel you've got things in hand, keep going with my blessing. Thanks for everything.
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>>112714
>>112715
>>112716
Posting corrections here. Page 146 is still a bit of a mess on the bottom half, so I tried to explain the idea of Mikado correcting the Japanese terms used, not so much the English ones. But the issue will be explained better for curious readers in the notes page.

Anyhow, understandable. Sometimes life just gets busy, or shitty, or both. Thanks again for all the hard work with this up to now. I’ll have to take a glance through the remaining chapters up to 40 to see anything big needs clearing up (chapters after that I think we’ve mostly got as they are; just a matter of moving post-release corrections from notes pages into the actual pages themselves, and maybe a bit of rewording here and there for easier visual reading). Might take me a day or two, so if you can make a note to at least briefly check back in after that to see if there’s anything mentioned, that would be swell.

Regardless, it’s been fun working with you over the years, and I know I’ve learned a lot from this project. I do suppose it might be wise for me and IMF to look into recruiting people to finish the rest though, but do feel welcome to still contribute when, if, and where you can.
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>>112720
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>>112716
Okay, so, checking things, a few pressing points here. You can take your time getting back to me on them

>Ch 17
Had this come up as an in-between point a few months ago and asked about it here >>111029, but assuming you weren’t the anon who answered there, what’s your take on it here? Is the idea of Makura being a Dokkaku soldier who can “pass” for normal and go shopping to some degree intended as a cultural joke to lighten the mood before speaking seriously, or do you think she’s being honest about that as a legitimate reason why the others dislike her? It’s from page 140 here >>112721 , to be clear.

>Ch 22
I think the biggest concern that I would have to ask about would be in chapter 22, regarding the bubble text and its intent. In my looking, they resemble the lines from the Heart Sutra as seen at the end of the series, with the sanskrit reading as “Gate […] Gate […] Paragate […] Parasamgate”, which makes me feel that we ought to be cohesive in the spellings and definitions. However, I also notice that the actual kanji used, as well as the lines apparently defining the terms, are spelled slightly differently in each set (green is chapter 22, red is chapter 93):
>至れる者よ羯諦!至れる者よ羯諦!
<掲諦掲諦 (Furigana: 往ける者よ往ける者よ)
>完全に至れる者よ波羅僧羯諦!!
<波羅僧掲諦 (Furigana: 彼岸に全く往ける者よ)
>成就よめでたし菩提薩波訶!!
<菩提薩波訶 (Furigana: 悟りあれ幸あれ)
So I figure I might ask two things: are these meant to be the same concepts as seen with Baku’s calligraphy in chapter 93, the mismatched spellings and definitions an unintentional mistake, and thus the terms/spellings should match? Or should they be written differently between both chapters in Eng too? For what it’s worth, both 羯諦 and 掲諦 seem to read nearly the same in Chinese, looking at how they romanize (jiédì and jiēdì) from what it seems. And secondly, does the Japanese text come off as fully spoken/thought lines, or more akin to furigana for the Sanskrit-to-Chinese Buddhist terms, where the latter is spoken and the former for reader understanding? IE: would they be better written something like “Gate! Gate! (He has arrived! He has arrived!)”? Just wondering, given, text sizes/fonts aside, the raw page in chapter 93 is formatted very similarly.

>Ch 23
I’ve seen that the poem by Atsushi used here is known not just as “Tiger Poet”, but also “The Moon Over the Mountain”. Apparently it’s not just an English issue either, as I see wikipedia cites two different Japanese names for it as well, “山月記” and “人虎伝”. The raw uses the former kanji set, both in art visuals and as the crediting for reciting parts in the text blocks. Thus I’m thinking it would be more appropriate to stick to the former as the name used here, while making mention of the other in the notes, but what do you think?

Lastly, is that just decorative paint below the manji logo on Zombist’s Chinook, or is it a stylized kanji that means something at least some readers would recognize? Or perhaps some word in Sanskrit?here the latter is spoken and the former for reader understanding? IE: would they be better written something like “Gate! Gate! (He has arrived! He has arrived!)”? Just wondering, given, text sizes/fonts aside, the raw page in chapter 93 is formatted very similarly.

>Ch 23
I’ve seen that the poem by Atsushi used here is known not just as “Tiger Poet”, but also “The Moon Over the Mountain”. Apparently it’s not just an English issue either, as I see wikipedia cites two different Japanese names for it as well, “山月記” and “人虎伝”. The raw actually uses the former kanji set, both in visuals and as the crediting for reciting parts in the text blocks. Thus I’m thinking it would be more appropriate to stick to the that as the name used here, while making mention of "Tiger Poet"/人虎伝 also being valid in the notes, but what do you think?

Lastly, is that just decorative paint below the manji logo on Zombist’s Chinook, or is it a stylized kanji that means something at least some readers would recognize? Or perhaps some relevant lettering/word in Sanskrit?
Good to know you are still going with that translation.
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Do you have any plans to translate the author's other works like Nirvana Panic?
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>>112820
Been hard enough just trying to get through the revamp here.

In all seriousness though, and this is just me speaking for myself here as typesetter/research, I’d certainly like to work on more of Itoh’s stuff in the future, and quite a few of his works are significantly shorter than Kouya. That said, while I have managed to find raws of various other series of his for translation notes images, Nirvana Panic!! has not been one of them. And I know a set has to have existed at some point, being that I did come across an upload link in an old forum post along with the cover as a directly posted image. But either the upload was so long ago that the content was removed, or the upload was to one of the long-since defunct file hosting sites, like rapidshare or megaupload; I forget which was the case, but either way, it’s gone, and I wasn’t able to find a reupload anywhere.

Now, if you or anyone else do manage to find full raws for it, let me know so I can at least make a backup. Better to have them around than not, be it for confirming reference notes or as their own projects.

On a related note, thank you for that page photograph. Helps confirm that the forehead scars Tigi-tigil gave Makura were meant to further her appearance being a reference to Hanumat there. Though Makura’s are a bit more narrow.
>>112820
No raws anywhere for this. Needs a full scan work.
bump = cocaine
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A "I hope the team is alive" kind of bump, a strange bump, a bizarre bump of sorts, so to speak (perchance.
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IMF here, RAW provider and uploader; Is there anyone lurking here anymore? Hello?! Loleron will be shutting this teal shithole down at the end of April >>114188 where the hell do we go? Any ideas?
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>>114204
It's joever.
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>>113934
>>114204
>>114208
Typesetter here. Apologies, been busy with stuff. I haven’t come across anyone around the webring able to take up up the mantle of redrawing, which we’re going to need in order to keep up quality for the revamp (was also looking into the potential for Onmyou no Kami and Dragon Roars in the meantime for their potential as short projects, but it looks like someone else got the latter out a few months ago? Not sure who exactly; the antivirus I use hard blocks mangadex, and mangaupdates hasn't listed a scanlation group; could be an AI scanlation for all I know). I was thinking of maybe trying to advertise for help on mangaupdates as they have a recruitment forum, but I’m not entirely sure what the average quality of people in the community there are.

Either way, we would indeed need to find somewhere else good to work out of. A friend of mine said Kouya proved quite popular with anons elsewhere on 4ch which would perhaps make it easier to find help in terms of willingness, but I’m also not sure if I’d want to recruit from the quality of anons there, let alone try to work a project like this there with their posting/404 speed. Other anime/manga focused webring options look to be and smug/a/ and zzz/a/. Not sure if the former’s janny bot would hamper manga scanlation being based out of there. zzz/a/ is admittedly slow/borderline dead, but could be better as a workspace. However, it is marked as a SFW board, albeit allowing NSFW material if spoilered and not explicitly hentai, but I have no idea how the owner and/or moderation there defines that. No meta thread there and the rules thread was immediately locked.

This is just me wanting to stick to imageboards though, between anonymity and ease of uploads/posting. I imagine most other groups just opt for their own personal discords these days. Personally, I think zzz/a/ could potentially make for a suitable workspace at the very least, Kouya not intended as hentai and more just a mature, adult manga. I'd likely have ask if the board owner’s cool with hosting it as a work-in-progress though, and ideally without us having to spoiler every page that just so happens to have nudity or sex to stay within the rules. I doubt TWOMR could get the same exemption even if Kouya does.

What are your thoughts though? Given how much work we’ve already put in, I’d rather not see the thing entirely abandoned due to lack of help or workspace, but I feel like we’re the only ones left as of now.
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>>114213
>I was thinking of maybe trying to advertise for help on mangaupdates as they have a recruitment forum, but I’m not entirely sure what the average quality of people in the community there are.
A lot of the vocal posters there are of a Progressive leaning. But that is based on my experience when I was finally banned there six years ago, after the previous eight years of using the site just fine. I will admit that I did become a bit of a sperg that final year, but that was when debating with one of the site admins. And the guy was a self-declared East German, born right before the fall of the wall, and thought that the USSR effectively "did nothing wrong".
>This is just me wanting to stick to imageboards though
You can also see if anyone on 8moe/a/ is interested. That board has seen a bit of a revival.
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>>114218
>A lot of the vocal posters there are of a Progressive leaning.
I see. Might be best to avoid asking for help there then. Where though would those working on potentially “problematic to normalfags” works go to find help at for projects these days? I mean, has it all just been imageboards for a while now, or is there decent crossover or something between the H-doujin scanlation community and mature manga scanlation, given how both are prone to similar content, at least at times?

>8/moe/
I mean, I guess it wouldn’t hurt if you wanted to ask anons there if any have the skills to help out. But given what I’ve known of Mark and Acid over the years, I wouldn’t actually want to do our work on their boards.
>>114213
Could you give me a page to try and redraw, I've attempted it in the past and it didn't go so well but now I have a drawpad so I might as well give it another go
Replies: >>114300
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>>114299
I'll give you a few here, so you can try some different things. Try to clear the title kanji and, if feasible, the sound effects on the first (if you need, I can provide you with text overlays tomorrow that might reduce the work needed), and try to stitch the latter two if you're up for it. We can figure out something else to do for the sound effects, like notations, but at this point, clearing the title kanji and stitching spreads are going to be the biggest visual hurdles for maintaining consistency.
Replies: >>114308
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>>114300
Since I don't have the translated title text I just cleared the kanji for the time being, also it turns out the stitch doesn't actually match up correctly. I tried just putting them together but there was a clear mismatch everywhere, so the only way to properly match them is by leaving the empty space there. Since the kanji on the books are quite small I did two versions, one where the text is cleaned up and one where it's left untouched. I can give the sound effects a go if I get the text overlays.
Replies: >>114324
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>>114308
Apologies, had some stuff come up. Going to address this over a few posts:

First, “clearing text” from a background isn’t just whiting or blacking it out, unless the background itself is purely white or black (which does happen occasionally and makes things quite easy). In most cases, for Kouya (and other Itoh works) anyhow, it means trying to approximate the background art behind the text that said text was layered over prior to print, and “clearing” it from the page by overwriting the area with that approximation. Obviously, it’s easier said than done, and I imagine takes choosing from at least a few different techniques to achieve, depending on the level of detail and size of the area of the art that the raw text was placed over.

Here are some examples of another chapter’s title page, with the original raw, the previous redrawer’s edit, and how the English text looks over said edit.
Replies: >>114325
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>>114324
As to stitching, yeah, it’s sort of weird, but despite the raws for this being from a digital version of the series, the pages for spreads here pretty much never align on their own. I don’t know if reader applications like the kindle are supposed to be smart enough to fudge the “bend” of a book to make the spreads feel more naturally connecting, but obviously Takuma Shoten’s way of handling spreads doesn’t work for flat pages. When it comes to stitching them together into a seamless feeling image, the previous redrawer had to make a lot of adjustments within the boundaries of the “seam”, without losing much if any of the actual art in the process. Again, it is admittedly easier said than done, and some spreads are more simple or more complex

As before, here’s an example of the previous stitcher’s work for one of these. The vertical blue line is to visualize where the individual pages met before, and the area highlighted in red being the space he more or less chose to edit within. In this case, it looks like he opted to just select certain elements and move them slightly up or down until they connected, but that could well just be the technique a “mechanical” feeling spread required.
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>>114325
In any case, I suppose I should have explained what we were looking for more clearly to begin with.

Here is an overlay for the first page. To use it, layer it over the raw page (not sure what program you’re using, but look for a “place” command, or the program's equivalent of it that allows for directly inserting an image file), with the layer corners aligning with the page corners. It’s the same dimensions even though it doesn’t cover the full page, as it’s output from the same canvas size.

Looking at the English title (“Turnover”) again, that’s actually going to have to be positioned on a “second line” due to the amount of space required to render it surpassing what was left to the edge of the page. That, or not only would the kanji need to be cleared, but the "ACT37:" moved a ways to the left and the kanji still cleared. So unfortunately, the English text isn’t apt to help so with reducing redrawing. As to the sound effects, it took some research to figure out what exactly the noise is supposed to be, and thus how it might be best rendered in English. I believe it is a “garamut” being played – a traditional idiophone instrument in Papua New Guinea hollowed out tree trunk with a single long slit carved into it. They’re broadly known as “slit drums” or “slit gongs” in English, with numerous regional variants found throughout Africa, southeast Asia, and Oceania as well as Mesoamerica, specifically the Aztec and Taino. Most are played horizontally and are smaller (with carrying handles and played from the lap), but there are also quite large ones, as well as vertical, totem-looking ones like this. 

While played sort of like a drum using a solid sticks, they produce a notably different sound as they’re wood-on-wood rather than having a surface of skin. It’s sort of a reverberating “knocking” sound, which might explain the “ko”, “kon”, “ko-kon sounds in the raw, but obviously “knock” doesn’t quite feel like a musical sound in English. I’ve opted to just transliterate it as “kohn” and variants of, and the previous page where the sound and instrument itself first appear will have a note about it being a low, hollow wooden sound. Pic is very similar to the one seen in Kouya, albeit coming from Vanuatu, specifically the island of Ambrym. If anyone wants to actually hear one, a similarly large, but horizontal one, can be heard below:
https://inv.nadeko.net/watch?v=9006ceVc5l8
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mangadex is basically dead btw
>>114652
Good, they got what they deserved.
>>114652
is there a good alternative?
Replies: >>114672
>>114660
Weebdex. Found this one out on smug. It defaults to banning anything weoorst keoereang because it's a legal liability that's not worth upkeeping.
Seems pretty good. Only the nips had their own pirate site in which to upload raws and >we'd be golden.
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>>114652
>incorporated within the UK
Terribru. That won't have any major repercussions.
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>>114652
No impossible, how could this happen?!
>>114652
Didn't they recently purge all works with less-than-18-years-old characters in lewd situations? Guessing they were aiming to clean house for western publishers/advertisers. Also guessing that would mean TWOMR and Kouya having gotten the axe as far as being hosted prior to going "legit".
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>>114686
>Didn't they recently purge all works with less-than-18-years-old characters in lewd situations?
I wouldn't be surprised, what are the odds of them keeping the shota mangos, but not the loli mangos.
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>>114689
>fujotranny occupied site
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